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Re: Does anyone want to talk about abandonment?

Posted by DaisyM on May 23, 2004, at 19:04:46

In reply to Re: Does anyone want to talk about abandonment? terrics, posted by Dinah on May 23, 2004, at 15:54:17


Would you say that you were able to form secure attachments in your childhood? There is a lot of evidence that children who were traumatized in one way or another often suffer from this fear. And I do mean suffer. It typically comes out as worrying that we are NOT doing enough to please whoever it is we don't want to leave us. Or, we hold everyone away because we *know* they are going to leave us.

The feeling usually makes me sick to my stomach. I can get twisted up about this issue really fast, if I think about my behavior in therapy too much or what I said. I do tell my Therapist how afraid I am to trust him this much and how painful it will be for me if he leaves me. He is willing to reassure me but often notes that the words probably don't make a difference, it is the consistency of him meeting my needs that will help.

I do think you should tell your new Therapist your fears. And I think you should talk about her cancelling affected you. It is highly unlikely that she is thinking that she can't help you or doesn't like you. More likely, she feels bad that you are still hurting yourself.

Please take care.




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