Posted by fallsfall on April 1, 2004, at 8:21:00
In reply to Re: Bipolar yet getting a second opinion... » gardenergirl, posted by Pandabear on March 31, 2004, at 22:46:04
I understand your frustration.
I do everything I can to do the "right" thing for therapy. But everytime I try to do the right thing, it is wrong. And it seems that if I then assume that I should do the "wrong" thing, that that is wrong, too.
I don't know how many times I have said "Just tell me what to do and I'll do it, I don't know what you want me to do". And he says things like "but if I tell you what to do, then you will make sure that it fails - to prove to me that what I tell you to do is wrong".
I completely understand your frustration. And things that you have always done (like take care of people). I do a little better when he tells me NOT to do things I've always done like that. I can intellectually understand why he says that, and I can force myself to behave properly, but boy is it painful!!!! Incredible anxiety.
My old therapist tried to deal with my dependency by reducing sessions and "forcing" me to be more independent. She wanted me to go from once a week to every other week. That was just always painful. My new therapist started me at twice a week, and we just went to 3 times a week. He is Pyschodynamic - she was CBT. There is a real difference in treatment philosophies. Time will tell if more frequent is better for me, but it FEELS better. I still have tons of anxiety after I see him (because he challenges everything that I know to be true) - but at least I don't have to hold the anxiety as long - I can go see him and get NEW anxiety.
I am going to start a new thread below on "Potential Unconscious". I don't want to deflect your "frustration" topic. Please read my new thread, too, and tell me what you think.
You are NOT alone. I can SOOOOO identify with your post!!!
(((Pandabear)))
poster:fallsfall
thread:330550
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040327/msgs/331206.html