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Re: Why do they do this to me? Pandabear

Posted by fallsfall on February 13, 2004, at 11:33:15

In reply to Re: Why do they do this to me? pegasus, posted by Pandabear on February 12, 2004, at 19:11:03

Gardener Girl reminded me of something else that helps me. A "Transitional Object". It is like Linus' blanket, but I try to make it a little more grown up looking.

I carry a rabbit's foot in my pocket. It is very soft and when I fiddle with it, it comforts me. I love "soft" things - people's hair, soft dogs, stuffed animals etc. The rabbit's foot is small enough to fit in my pocket (and I can even fiddle with it while it is in my pocket). It is small enough that when I take it out usually people don't even notice. I wore most of the fur off my old one and had to find new ones (hard to find - I found them at a small hardware store) - got two. The purple one's dye came off all over my hands. The red on is OK. Maybe I can rinse the purple one (it is softer).

I have a friend who carries a "worry stone" it is maybe 1 1/2 inches square and not very thick. It is polished very smooth and there is an indent in the middle and she slides her thumb through the indent. Again, it is small and unobtrusive.

I feel lucky to have a picture of my therapist. It was on a web page (which has since been taken down). Sometimes I put his picture on my computer screen. I printed a copy (it is very small), and I keep it next to my bed. When I need him, I can look at it. It is a really good picture and has his "therapist" look perfectly. Only once I put the picture in my pocket and carried it with me.

Last night when I went to sleep I had two dogs in bed with me, and I was holding the rabbit's foot and my therapist's picture.

If you don't have a teddy bear you should absolutely make a top priority to find the softest most huggable stuffed animal you can find. This is one place where spending a little extra for good quality is really worth it. I like Gund. Toy's R Us also has really soft stuffed animals. My teddy bear was usurped in my bed (after 7 years) by my dogs, who stay softer over time, have heartbeats, and lick my face.

I also find that I can get comfort if I wear a velour shirt - that is the kind of softness that comforts me.

So see if you can find a "fiddle toy". If you look around your house or some stores, I bet that something will jump out at you that is comforting for you.

P.S. My rabbit's foot is also helpful when I feel like picking at my skin - so it helps to reduce my self-injury.

 

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