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Re: Validation fallsfall

Posted by Rigby on February 13, 2004, at 10:12:16

In reply to Re: Validation Rigby, posted by fallsfall on February 12, 2004, at 23:31:03

Hi Falls,

I'm never up front about the bottomless pit of needing approval but I think I go for it in pretty intense ways like seduction. I'd never ask up front for it so that actually sounds a bit healthier! At least you're dealing with it straight up!


> I know exactly what you are talking about. Right now, I need to know that I have my therapist's "approval" - basically that I'm doing the "right thing" in therapy. He wants me to know that for myself, so he wouldn't say so for a couple of sessions. Finally I was able to convince him that I couldn't tolerate what he was doing and he gave me enough approval so that I can function again. When I left his office I felt like I needed him so much - I wanted to walk right back in to see him. It absolutely feels like a bottomless pit.
> My therapist and I are now talking about whether I have/did have approval from my parents, and we're talking about my "rebellions" (I dropped out of college - oh, horror! - and married "beneath myself"). He finds it interesting that my rebellions were pretty significant, yet I am so dependent now. Back in the days I was rebelling, I wasn't dependent at all - I was omnipotent! I have no idea where all this will go.
> If you find out how to stopper up the bottomless pit, let me know.




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