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Re: Due to the mature nature of this post... » All Done

Posted by Adia on January 16, 2004, at 13:07:54

In reply to Due to the mature nature of this post..., posted by All Done on January 15, 2004, at 14:16:09

Hi..
I just wanted to let you know you are not alone in this struggle..

My T is away right now..but I was starting to work with her on my sex issues..
I was sexually abused by my father.

Now I hate hate hate sex and wish I could live without it all my life. The relationship with my partner is hanging by a thread because now I can´t even stand to be kissed..or to sleep in the same bed. I panic, I feel I won´t be able to handle the consequences, what it makes me feel. I just can´t. The moment we are alone I feel I want to cry and curl up and be held safely as a child.

It´s really hard. He tells me he wants to see some progress, now it´s been months since I was able to let him do something..We argue all the time. I can´t even be strong and get through it, I haven´t let him touch me for a long time now.

I´ve talked with him a lot and he knows i hate sex and I told him I need professional help and now with my T away it´s really hard...we´ve talked a lot but still he feels really tired.

I too feel a bit hopeless about whether T can help with this..I do hate sex and if I could I would never ever do it, but I want to have kids and I would like to work this out but I feel I will never like that, I just want to be able to get through it at least once a month so I don´t lose my boyfriend.
Still, I do have some hope that with therapy things can improve...
I hang on to that......

Just wanted to share...
I hope you can share with your therapist...
Maybe if it is too difficult , you can write it down..I´ve done that...

Have you talked about it with your husband?
Is he patient?

Just wanted to share and let you know I understand.

Adia.


> I’m generally not so bold – especially with groups of people that are new to me, so here it goes. I’ve noticed a lot of posts that include comments by the poster that he or she has an aversion to sex. I’ve told my therapist that I basically never want sex and that I’m hoping to improve my sex life with my husband. So, I have two questions for you all:
>
> 1. Have you discussed your sexual aversions with your therapist?
>
> 2. Do you believe therapy can change the way you feel about sex?
>
> I have my doubts that therapy can help, so I ask myself why I discuss it at all with him. To me, it would be like me telling him that I don’t like chocolate (Ha! Just an example, of course). How in the world would he be able to help me change that? If I don’t like it, I don’t like it. Know what I mean?
>


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:Adia thread:301258
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040116/msgs/301640.html