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Re: So, it turned out to be an AFGO! Dinah

Posted by mair on January 8, 2004, at 8:09:09

In reply to Re: So, it turned out to be an AFGO! tabitha, posted by Dinah on January 7, 2004, at 19:31:27

>" We've had the discussion a few times. Sometimes directly, more often indirectly. He says he cares about me, that he likes me, that he wants what's best for me. That he's fond of me if only for all the years we've put in together. That he wouldn't have been my therapist for all those years if he disliked me. But it's all that therapist stuff that all therapists say, and so I distrust it."


Dinah - I certainly know what you mean because I've used similar reasoning to filter out all sorts of positive things my therapist has said. On the other hand, this statement reminded me an awfully lot of the reaction I sometimes get from my children when I pay them a compliment. You know the "you're only saying that because you're my mother" kind of reaction. I sometimes feel that having one of my kids react in that way is too bad because my compliment was so genuine. So how do we tell when our therapist's positive comments are genuine? It's particularly tough when the recipient is, like so many of us, poised to believe only the worst.

Mair


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poster:mair thread:297437
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040102/msgs/297995.html