Posted by starlight on June 27, 2003, at 12:55:43
In reply to Re: DID resources, posted by deirdrehbrt on June 21, 2003, at 21:07:26
Hi,
I've enjoyed your discussions. While I haven't been diagnosed with DID, I can seriously identify with what many of you have been talking about with regard to the "good" and "bad" self. I've had tons of therapy and have not been able to conquer this. It's reflexive. I was abused, emotionally and physically as a child, traumatized, outcast, you name it and as a result I have the part of me that literally wants to destroy me. It doesn't trust anyone, and wants to hurt me - it's sly, it creeps up when I think I'm fine, it's angry, frustrated - all that.And then there's the part of me trying to please, be beautiful, be accepted, be loved -but never really feels that that has occured.
From my rational mind, I understand the fallacy of this - I have experienced and know that there is only love behind this universe, all else is a veil of forgetfullness, maya so to speak - but I am unable to integrate this into my emotional self.
It sucks. Therapy has done nothing to fix the problem, only made me able to identify it. Those feelings continually surface.
I'm bipolar mixed.
starlight
poster:starlight
thread:229576
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030529/msgs/237522.html