Posted by catmint on March 9, 2003, at 4:28:48
In reply to A PLEA-PLEASE ANY ADVICE-I'M NEW, posted by KrissyP on March 8, 2003, at 22:19:41
Hey Kristen,
Sorry I didn't get back to you over at psychobabble. IF my typing sucks right now it's because I am a mess. I am think ing of q uit ing lamictal tomorrow. I am having major problems with stress too. I understand how you feel. I'ts co-dependency I think . I feel responsible for my boyfriends happiness. I can't seem to make our lives happy b/c of my ilness (bipolar) right now, I' dont'want to go on. I am crying sooo much, I need to call my pdoc, but he's kinda clueless. I sometimes don't know what to do. I am having major mood swings for the past three days after I increase the Lamictal to 75 mg. I am having the worst PMS ever! I'ts more like during my period, I'm really bad, not before. Anyway, I'm sick of being so messed up. I'm 36 and I should be better by now. I' m not going to give up but I might not take my meds tomorroww. Screw it, I know they are making me cycle like this. Today I woke up depressed and it got worse as the day went on, I was impatient, irritable, and snapping at my son who didn't deserve it. THen I went rock climbing at Indian Rock in Berkeley and Bam! Mood swing to the max, I'm having fun, meeting cool people, then we go to get some coffee and go to a bookstore, I'm still doing great! I'm talking a lot and loving my son more. I get home and my boyfriend and I are getting a long great, we take a shower and go to bed, I try to have sex but Bam! mood swing the other way, snowballs down, down, until I'm crying my eyes out, doubting my existence, wanting to hurt myself(I won't though don't worry), afraid my boyfriend will break up with me cause I'm so messed up. . I cry so hard that you'd think someone died.
Anyway, I'm writing to you now, not crying anymore, just drained, wondering about tomorrow. I want to be stable so bad, I know you do to.
Kristen, are you bipolar? What meds are you on. What have you taken in the past?
I hope you write back .Agian, if my typing sucks. it's because I''st 2 in the mornign and well, you know.
::Amy
poster:catmint
thread:207253
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030203/msgs/207319.html