Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

Re: Social Anxiety, depression, PTSD « bookgurl99

Posted by fuzzymind on December 12, 2002, at 4:49:14

In reply to Re: Social Anxiety, depression, PTSD « bookgurl99, posted by Dr. Bob on December 11, 2002, at 0:53:56

> [Posted by bookgurl99 on December 11, 2002, at 0:49:49
>
> In reply to http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20021203/msgs/131021.html]
>
> fuzz,
>
> you gotta get some help. you're too young, too smart, too full of potential to just let yourself die like this.
>
> it sounds like you have (no duh) a major social phobias. phobias are overcome by confronting them.
>
> it sounds like thoughts of the past are eating you up because you don't have much of a present. i was treated cruelly in jr. high and high school, and -- at age 27 -- those days are nothing to me anymore. the actions of dumb kids. now i have interests and relationships that take up my present-day.
>
> you owe it to yourself to find a qualified counselor and give it another shot. in 5 years, more has been discovered about social phobia and appropriate treatment. all you have to do -- is pick up the phone and make that first appointment. that first step towards having a life in present day.
>
> good luck,
>
> bookgurl99
>
> (p.s. my gf is korean. :D)


IN the beginning of 2001 on and off til the end of 2001 I tried again with the same shrink with a different approach. Nothing changed. I guess I really don't want to change or don't want to go through the hard work. I am so scared. I am afraid to die, but I am more afraid of living in the real world, which had treated me so cruelly. I was counting on the safety net of being able to not having to work, but the net is gone. My parents will visit again during Easter, propbably to discuss their plans to move in with me. I had planned on gassing myself in the garsage before their arrival. Four months away.

THere is SOOO much regret and anguish over what I could have been. ALl those jerks who referred to me as loser were right. I am a loser. No degree, no money, no job, no friends for 12 years. One of my fears in having to apply for a job is explaining myself what I have been doing for the past 12 years. ALos, what if I run into one of those abusive jerks, who would have such satisfaction over my predicament. Five years, ago, I did run into that abusive jewish guy at the airport when I was picking up my sister. From a distance, he recognize me and was about to come over to me, but I walked away. We were both waiting at the same hub.

Ultimately, I have literally no self-esteem. perfecionism, and all or nothing thinking. I rmemeber when I was being very defensive to abusive jerks, I would tell them that my grades were higher and I would be more successful thean they were. The only way I knew how to fight back. Well I am afraid if I go out in the real world, then I would encounter those people who would have a good laugh at me. Apparently, a lot of people from my HS are working in NYC or the tri-state area.

I don't want to die . I just want to stay like this for the rest of my life, but that won't happen it seems. I was afraid this day would come, but I was also so hoping it wouldn't. MY self- image is also very bad. I am very obese an Asian, don't smile, mumble, and doesn't make eye contact. How can someonle employ that during a recession when people with MBA's are having difficulkty finding work?


Share
Tweet  

Thread

 

Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post


Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.

 

Start a new thread

 
Google
dr-bob.org www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for
in

This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:fuzzymind thread:1782
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20021109/msgs/1802.html