Posted by jeff g on October 28, 2003, at 14:31:13
In reply to I know » jeff g, posted by Susan J on October 19, 2003, at 10:22:27
hey Susan just wanted to get an update.
Its been a month on the day, since we really broke up. I have been through a couple phases of grief, but even after all that, I still love her so much. She is in my thoughts all the time, and I am trying so hard to hold on to hope. She wants to be friends, and we went out to breakfast on Sunday morning. I thought we had a great time, nothing serious was brought up, and we had some great conversation and laughs. She even gave me a big hug afterwards. This boosted my hopes a lot, so now I am waiting for her to call me again. I know she probably just had a good time as friends, but I saw some of that gleam in her eye that used to be there, she wasnt so cold like she has been lately. My problem is that, seeing her like this and knowing I still love her so much, but not being able to express that or talk about it, is causing me a lot of pain and worry. However, Ive tried just totally ignoring her and not having her in my life, and that is even worse, then it feels like she's dead or something and really , really gone. I know I am probably foolish to hold on like this, but my love isn't going away and I am willing to suffer for a while just to give it a chance, as litle as that chance may be. I really don't know what's going on in her head lately, if she feels something for me but does not want to encourage my hopes, or if she just really wants to be friends but is uncomfortable with my love for her. I guess I am just rambling but I miss her so much its tearing me up and if you have any advice I'd love to hear it. I don't know how healthy it is to pine so much for someone who has possibly moved on completely. But my love is so strong, and I feel like we have so much potential, that I don't know how to let go and get 'over her'.