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Re: Just for the record Cal

Posted by Racer on October 10, 2008, at 14:45:15

In reply to Re: Just for the record, posted by Cal on October 10, 2008, at 3:32:07

I almost had to laugh about something in your post -- where you say that you've ignored anything from the neck down?

I was having dinner with a woman from group therapy -- eating disorder group -- and we were discussing childhood issues. I was telling a story about my childhood, and at the end she said, "Wow, that's amazing! You just told that incredible story about such traumatic events -- and you didn't feel a single bit of it, did you? You were entirely in your head!"

Yep -- sho'nuf. My head isn't always a good place to be, but it sure beats being in my body, in my life, inhabiting my entire self... And it is something my therapist is trying to work on with me. Sometimes I'm pretty resistant. (If she read that, she'd laugh -- sometimes I'm good at that sort of understatement!)

All these things are hard issues to deal with. From the sounds of it, you might find group therapy very helpful -- either around the adoption issues, or the body image issues. Groups have taught me a lot over the years -- so much of what I thought of as so shameful turned out to be far less painful once exposed to light, and to the sympathy of others. So much I thought was my own, private, personal shame turned out to be common amongst the other women in the groups -- including women I thought of as "perfect!" It's a very healing experience, and I could almost feel anxiety and pain just floating away into the ether.

I'm sorry your mother was such a -- no, no editorial opinions here. I'm sorry you experienced so much pain. I hope that you find it heals clean, and congratulate you on your work in therapy.




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