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Re: a rant about my out-of-control brother...

Posted by Dinah on February 6, 2009, at 22:29:21

In reply to Re: a rant about my out-of-control brother... Dinah, posted by sometimesblue on February 5, 2009, at 11:06:33

That's part of being a parent, sadly. Or a surrogate parent. Eventually you aren't able to protect them anymore. Even from their own bad choices.

I often tell my son that power comes when he has responsibility. That when he is on his own in the world, with his own job, and his own place, etc. that he will have the power to make his own rules. My son is totally ok with rules, so he just rolls his eyes and says "Of course!"

But the reverse is also true. It's impossible to have responsibility if you have no power. You're carrying the burden, but you aren't really responsible because you just don't have the power.

It's ok to try to help him the best you can of course. But please try to lessen the burden on yourself of feeling responsible for the outcome.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:877636
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/child/20070211/msgs/878645.html