Posted by okydoky on June 30, 2008, at 12:09:14
In reply to Re: Hypnotism for Agoraphobia, posted by nolvas on June 29, 2008, at 19:45:35
"I have experience with hypnotism and nlp in treating agoraphobia"
Thanks for the input. What is "nlp
I don't know much about agoraphobia, but in writing this I just read the diagnostic manual. I certainly have "anticipatory anxiety"
When I was living at my family home again in my 20s (I am 49) I would walk the dog or go for a walk myself I always had my heart pumping quick and would walk in a kind of circle on the street behind my house so that if I chose to stop I could cut through a back yard and be home immediately. I never knew why this was. From the age of 15 I had anorexia and then bulimia accompanied by body dysmorphia and shame of my body. In the early years if I had even felt like I was "fat" I did not want anyone to see me or get dressed because my clothes were tight so I would not go out.
For many years I had no problems. I am a very social person and become very "vital" when I am around people.
I think this started again and got very bad when my "interstitial cystitis" became intolerable. It became very difficult for me to go out for any length of time because I had urinary frequency/urgency and would become very anxious and in pain. This is when I started not going out so much. But I was hiking with the Sierra club and once I got out I was fine. Getting out, like trying to break through a granite barrier I set up myself was difficult but once out I was fine as long as I had no bad frequency issues. For a couple of years a few friends would meet me close to my home to go hiking or sometimes when I was very bad food shopping and other essential stuff, and drive me or with me to the hike. I was fine that way.
When I am anticipating going out I never think these thoughts like I am too fat or that I might be terrified with anticipation that while I am out I will have a constant feeling of urgency, I just feel a general feeling of anxiety that stops me in my tracks. Sometimes when I have an explicit need to go out I try and run all my errands because I know if I don't they might not get done as once home I am highly unlikely to go out again. I don't work so most days I have no explicit reason to go out. To make matters even worse because my depression has gotten so bad my home now is a disaster area. I cannot invite people in. It is embarrassing. I have become isolated almost completely in this house.
I really miss being around people. I have completely isolated myself and sit here alone getting more depressed daily. I have never liked being alone. Even now I almost never turn the TV off to be alone with my thoughts. It hurts too much. I remember having so much fun hiking with different people or being at work, even when I was quite depressed when I was alone I would become very lively in a group. Always was that way. I guess I just don't get it.
You spoke of facing my fears but I never feel like there is a particular fear going on. Just general anxiety pushing me to stay in. What I wrote were just educated guesses on my part as to why and how this all came about. Now reading this post I am remembering that I had problems with anxiety about going out much earlier in my life but always attributed it to depression. So except to just go and "do it" (which I cant seem to do most of the time) there does not seem to be anything to face. I did try for a couple of years having people meet me to go places and it worked but I never got to a place that was consistent where I could do it alone.
Well perhaps there might be some suggestions. It would be interesting/helpful to know how others have learned to change their behaviors and by changing the behavior does the fear dissipate?