Posted by Dinah on October 10, 2004, at 0:19:09
In reply to Re: I didn't read any. » Dinah, posted by gardenergirl on October 9, 2004, at 23:54:01
I think I would describe it differently... But we may be thinking of the same thing anyway. The genuine curiosity part I pick up on when my therapist does it. I don't see it as playing stupid or even exaggerating. Perhaps my therapist leaves that part out. He does it so very gently and with such obvious positive intent. His voice even lowers. I think the intent is to subtly shift the focus of thought in such a way as to encourage a deeper understanding of what one has said. It doesn't seem to have any negative intentions.
I have a tendency to do it myself in Sunday School. And I remember it distinctly from philosophy class. Not enough to explain it correctly, or to know the name of it.
Of course, I have no earthly idea what Dr. Bob intended. Only he could say that. That's how I read it. Perhaps he was genuinely interested in the nuances of hotel management, or how hotel management could be applied to Babble.
For myself, I can see a difference between asking someone or forcing someone to leave a place of business and asking someone or forcing someone to leave a community. Especially a community designed for support. Naturally, Dr. Bob *does* effectively do it, through blocks. But blocks are imposed for actions that violate specific rules. I realize that we sometimes don't understand enforcement, but I'll bet that's mainly because we can't see inside Dr. Bob's brain. I'm sure there's an internal logic.
Thank heavens I can't quite imagine Dr. Bob asking someone to leave for any other reason. Even when he says "Babble isn't right for everyone" or "You have to do what is best for you, of course" I wince. That sounds *enough* like "Don't let the door hit you on your way out". To do even that seems like a slap across the face. To say anything more direct, especially in the absence of civility guideline violations, would seem like a rejection of the person as a whole. I honor Dr. Bob for not doing that, especially when it has a cost for him in terms of monitoring time.