Posted by 64Bowtie on April 12, 2004, at 14:36:53
In reply to Some posters are being habitually overly sensitive, posted by Fallen4myT on April 6, 2004, at 0:11:01
Fallen4myT, Howdy. May I call you F4MT?
Our job from birth till about age 5 to 7 is pure survival. Aided by our "primary dependency object", this role is usually defaulted to "Mom", since for the first year or less, she is ubiquitous (everything and everywhere), we survive and absorb and react.
We come prewired for life to overcome life stuff that causes anything dissatisfying. Around age 15, we hopefully have passed through a thresshold and have a mediated sense of this urge. Some around us may frighten us when they are hedonistic, seeking satisfaction "no matter what".
Others, like the posters here at Babble that cause us concern, are symbolically invoking their primary dependency object. They are asking Dr-Bob to act like their Mom and take away the words they read as if the words came out off the page and physically pummelled them. But that's our job, remember to avoid dissatisfaction. Unfortunately for all (and for different reason's) Dr-Bob ain't their Mom and does'nt have her mandate for taking away dissatisfaction for the sake of survival.
When I get cut off on the freeway by some [*&^%$#] person, especially when driving my 64 Chevy Pick-up, I now remember that my Mom ain't driving me so I would be more 'unsafe' by acting out to invoke her wrath. I perceive clearly whatever the next driving action I must do to ensure calm and stable progress. By that time, I've lost my window-in-time to invoke Mom by screaming at the other driver, hopping up and down, flailing the steering wheel while flipping the bird (duh! Mom wouldn't have done that either, so why do I insist on that unsafe behavior??? Throws the whole concept of safety and survival out the window).
We do it not thinking! We feel dissatisfied. We don't think we are dissatisfied, we feel dissatisfied. We must avoid feeling dissatisfied, especially at the hand of others!!! It's our right and purpose!!!
Wrong! Maturity and hard work has helped me mediate my inate stuff. Everyone has my permission to share whatever they choose about me or about life in general. Last time I checked, none of you are able to affect or effect me through some direct wire hook-up.
I'm safe here. What you say may actually be right for you. Leave me out of it, if it contains your bad feelings about me. (yes, this is a boundary!)