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Horrible anxiety relapse (still reeling)

Posted by linkadge on November 17, 2019, at 18:14:15

I've just had one of the worse relapses in my life. I am still trying to process exactly what has happened.

I had been sleeping relatively well for the past few months. Within a matter of days, I started waking up within a few hours of falling a sleep with a feeling of horrible dread / panic. I took some old clonazepam which barely touched it. After more clonazepam I was able to fall asleep for perhaps 4 hours. I woke up at 4-5 in the morning with insane physical anxiety (feeling it in the back of my kidneys - adrenaline, cortisol release, who knows).

The next day I experienced intense anxiety throughout the day, mostly physical. Almost like serotonin syndrome or something (but with no change in meds).

This pattern has continued for a few days. I has subsided a bit, but I am left completely shattered. I don't know what brought this on, and why it has been so difficult to treat.

Early morning wakenings are my #1 fear as there seems to be little way to treat it.

I had been feeling some depression / apathy leading up to this event. I'm not sure (if I am bipolar) if this was a switch into mania (or a mixed state).

I have had this pattern in the past (far beyond regular run of the mill anxiety / insomnia). When it happens, the force is so strong, it seems to override heavy medications.

Meds that would normally knock me out barely touch it.





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