Posted by B2chica on March 26, 2016, at 12:06:23
i have searched the archives for anyone experiencing severe apathy while on amitriptyline and cant seem to find anything.
so im beginning to wonder if this issue are my underlying symptoms and would need to go up on tca or if the tca is causing this?
my smptoms are:
-moderate irritability first thing am for several hours
-TOTALLY in my head, prefer not to be talked to, do not want to talk, partly because annoyance and uselessness of it but also because of effort it takes.
-was very reflective and contemplative but now i am left with contemplative with negative apathetic retort back to self
-i cant seem to express any genuine emotion, i am able to attempt to fake smiles or interest with kids, but difficult and exhasting.
-Daily, for lack of better word laziness. i dont want to do anything, EVerything including getting up to go to the bathroom is an effort and i would prefer not to do it.
-Tired basically from the moment i wake up, all throughout the day and into the night.
-i not only have no interest in anything, i see no purpose in anything. it is all useless, pointless drudge that seems to drag on in voids.
-i am thankful when each day is done as that means one more day in my life is gone and i dont have to live it again...
-i have no thoughts of death nor wish to die, paradoxically nor do i really care to live.
-the only thing that gets me through the days is biding my time (which drags on in length) to get to 7:00 when i take my Lunesta, about 8-9 i have lucidity and slight reprieve of this void. and then i anticipate taking my tca which soon puts me to sleep and i am out for many hours.the odd thing about this apathy is despite how much i really dont care about things, i am writing this to you all and that am asking for suggestions- i know logically that i am not yet well and i need a change, yet i really dont care emotionally. luckily i have always been fairly good at compartmentalizing things and i can do this now.
-and there were some precipitating thoughts that ...disturbed me enough to realize i need to alter my state of being.thank you for any insight.
b2
"What is madness, but nobility of soul at odds with circumstance.
The day is on Fire, and i know the purity of pure despair."
Theodore Roethke
poster:B2chica
thread:1087573
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20160306/msgs/1087573.html