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Re: Dexedrine day 1 then given so much meds i was mad. » smoothste1

Posted by ChicagoKat on September 26, 2012, at 16:14:36

In reply to Dexedrine day 1 then given so much meds i was mad., posted by smoothste1 on September 25, 2012, at 11:26:09

> It was back in 1997 when i lived in london,had a good life had lived in new york and los angeles,when i was first prescribed dexedrine i was about 22.it didnt take long to become addicted to it,almost instantly.It made me so good inside,i would float down the street,and loved everyone around,and could talk to others i usually would of never done.After a month or so i had amphetamine psycosis,i went totally mad,scitzo.I ended up in whitechapel hospital for 3 weeks.As time quickly went on i was paranoid as hell,thinking people could see in the flat through the windows.The radio was playing songs for me,the television all had codes in it.Totally mad.I moved to manchester and my script moved with me,then the dose started to increase.Up to 75mg,100mg,150mg,then a gp put me on 200mg a day (40 pills)That was for 4 years.Well on 50mg to begin with,you can imagine the state of my mind.I was totally insaine,seeing things,hearing things,shaking,sweeting constantly,confusion,i thought i could see and communicate with ufo,s and look at the moon,and knew they were on the moon and almost at planet earth.Another thing i would think i was not in the uk,i was on something like an island,somewhere secret which was built just to look like manchester,maybe in china,no area 51,somewhere i really did believe it for so long.I would hang coat hangers from the ceiling then have them hang down by all the doors,the front door,if they moved in the night or clinked i knew somebody was trying to get in.People in the street talked about me and laughed at me,calling me a variety of names,this went on for so long.I was sent to see a amphetamine psyciatrist.She was good and although i tried to hide all the madness,she caught me out time after time,and she was concerned about my state of mind.I wasnt a danger to others i would never hurt anyone else no matter what drug i took,but i was a danger ot myself.With-in this time by some of the doctors i had been prescribed to name a few theridazine,procycledone,prozac,antisycotics time release,like beads in a capsual,other anti-depressants old and new,lithium,librium,plus lots of others.The new dr told me i was going to loose my mind on 200mg dexedrine,she had never heard of that dose ever,so she decreased it to 100mg 20 a day.Along with 30mg valium,400 sulpride,and 225mg effexor.And this went on for another 8 years.Over time i must of been on so many diffrent meds it was crazy,swaping 1 to another,stopping 1 a new 1 to take its place also.All because i was given dexedrine in 1997 50mg,and the rest says it all.Dexedrine is extremely addictive,a lot more than street speed/whiz/billy even if it is paste and stronger,dexedrine does something to make you extremely addicted very quick,no matter what.Ok there are a few who manage to get off it or come off it,a very few.When you first take it you are usually given no information,addictive info,controlled drug info nothing.I was.14 years has ruined my life i have few friends in manchester,i dont really like going out,even to the shops sometimes,i sleep odd patterns sometimes sleep at 8 am till 3 pm other times 5pm to 5 am,time is all messed up.Sometimes sleep lightly other times sleep like an oxe.Mad dreams but remember them the next night,usually.I feel depressed,low,down,and suisidal sometimes,i do need help,but the drs are a waste of time,they really dont give a dam about your past.I have wrote to a psyciatrist at wythenshawe hospital today,and left it at reception,hopeing someone will pick it up,read it and help me,i wrote to my gp asking for some meds but he has not called me yet.I do have an appointment to see a psycologist on thursday,he is a nice cool guy but he cant prescribe,do you know what the meaning of them is,what are they suppossed to do....I dont know.. ? If you have a child either being put on esp dexedrine,ritalin,or meth-amphetamine,be aware of what i have said,my mind was working fine until dexedrine messed up all the chemicals in the brain,if i had a kid,and told they had adhd,id let them loose energy in the garden,give them things to do.I think amphetamine and 3 years up is total madness,insaine even and not right.All be warned dexedrine is the devil inviting you to another world,full of fun and excitment.It is ugly,addictive and hell once in, you cant get out........cheers ste

Smoothste1 (I don't know what other name to use, sorry), your post made me so sad. You have been through hell all because of dexedrine, which is really a legallly prescribed form of a street drug. I've been on stimulansts myself...mostly Ritalin, and I guess I was fortunate that the side effects - severe nausea and anxiety - not to mention the fact that sometimes it worked for me and sometimes it didn't - led me to give up on it. We all react very differently to every drug. There is so much we don't know about the brain and why people react so differently. For instace, my husband has adult ADD and is on Vyvanse (a legal extended release form of dexamphetamine) and he has been on it for years at the same dose and it still helps him. It doesn't even raise his blood pressure. So there's another example of how we all react differently. Unfortunately, you reacted very, very badly, became hooked on it then needed more and more to get the same high until you finally had a psychotic episode. I know I'm not telling you anything you don't know. What I don't understand is why you can't find a really good psychiatrist, who, if he/she was really good, would admit you to the hospital for a controlled detox off of all your meds, in a manner that would cause you as few bad side effects as possible. That doctor would then see you outside the hospital and try to find a med or combo of meds that would help you. And definitely no more stimulants. It's VERY MUCH worth it for you to find such a good psychiatrist. You can't continue to live the way you are.

It's too bad you're in the UK, and also too bad you aren't in Chicago. I have the best psychiatrist in the world. He is caring, he is knowledgeable and experienced, he knows his stuff, and he is willing to listen. I mean it, he really cares, and hates to see his patients suffering. I will ask him when I see him on Tuesday if he happens to know any good psychiatrists in Manchester (that's where you are, right?). It's a long shot, but you never know he just may know someone. Otherwise you have to keep searching. And DON'T rely on a GP to help you. They are nowhere near enough experienced in psychiatry to help you.

I wish you luck; I truly care and hope you can find a good psychiatrist and go through treatment and get your life back. If you have any questions, I check this forum regularly and would be happy to answer them for you, or just be support if you need it.
All my best,
Kat


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