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to g_g_g_unit

Posted by maoiuser on April 17, 2012, at 8:07:02

In reply to Re: Multiple years on MAOIs and my conclusions » SLS, posted by g_g_g_unit on April 17, 2012, at 0:52:46

at one point when i maintained my weight and excercised i did feel my self-worth improved significantly..now that is not the case as i put on tremendous amount of weight and my self worth is even lower than what it used to be prior to nardil...
when at one point it improved so much that i had to loose certain friends who were too used to seeing me self loathe and be weak.. these people would always be around offering advise when i was self loathing and weak but unfortunately it seems as though they were using me for their own self worth.. were they good people or bad people? that is a very difficult question to answer..

if you are here posting that you actually feel that the girl may be "wrong" then i do not see where the problem is... when i couldnt handle maois i did not know the difference between right and wrong..if you are more accepting of others then that may be a good thing but if you are starting to accept people who can do you more harm then good then that may be a problem..

i would advise not to evaluate everything from the perspective of the nardil... nardil can alleviate your symptoms.. you may still need a lot of self-evaluation along with some social training (self-help books or psychologist) to get the maximum benefit..and a lot of practice and self discipline..

if i look back now a couple of years i see that starting nardil after the laundry list of medicines was like starting a new life and i was not ready for it at first... i didnt even know what life would be like without the illness i suffered for as long as i can remember..

i still get depressed and i still feel anxious and i still feel rejected and i still get angry (although initially all of the anxious and depressing feelings were wiped during the initial mania like high).. but i must say that now all of these feelings are very much similar to other normal people..


> > Can you describe this impulsivity?
> >
> > Impulsivity might be function of the lifting of depression and a rush to feel the sensation of reward that is still new to you. Then again, maybe not. If it is, it will take some time to find balance and learn to defer reward and gratification while more fully deliberating decisions.
> >
> >
> > - Scott
>
> Hmm, well I do have prior addictive/impulsive traits like the original poster which I've found have been reactivated. Sadly, this has meant less control over alcohol intake, so I've decided to avoid it for the time being.
>
> I guess I might describe it as increased social motivation (and decreased rejection sensitivity), which for me goes hand-in-hand with alcohol. Another example is - I recall being pursued by a girl who was theoretically 'wrong' for me while depressed. I deflected all of her invitations etc. because I felt so little self-worth and ultimately she gave up. On the other hand, while my sense of self-worth hasn't really altered, I've found myself quite intensely pursuing a different girl who's 'wrong' for me while on Parnate.
>
> Much of my time spent depressed is in fact devoted to a 'rush to feel the sensation of reward' (i.e. food/TV binges etc.), so my hope is that, like you say, Parnate might allow for some balance.
>


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poster:maoiuser thread:1015647
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20120411/msgs/1015783.html