Posted by JohnLA on March 1, 2012, at 22:08:26
in a few weeks my 2 year anniversary of my first ever depressive episode will arrive...
i'm currently on 30mg of remeron and 2mg to 3mg a day of klonopin.
i've tried the following;
lexapro
zoloft
cymbalta
effexor
wellbutrin
celexa
nuvigil
a baby dose of abilify for a few days only
and 12 sessions of unilateral ectall did not help. some kicked my *rs*. (wellbutrin for example.)
i also do talk therapy once a week
with the remeron and klonopin i sleep well and do not get too excited about anything. when my depression started i was extremely agitated, lost a ton of weight, and could not sleep. now, at least i sleep, am calm and am unfortunately getting fat for the first time in my life.
so, in some ways i am better. but overall i am spending most of my time in bed both day and night ruminating. also, part of those ruminations are suicidal thoughts. in 1 month it will be 2 years since i last worked. if i don't go back to teaching in sept they put me on early-retirement at a much lower pension. i really don't want that. i'm only 49.
i am waiting to see 2 doctor's about ketamine this month. 1 does the iv method and the other does it intra-nasal or sublingual.
can someone make a suggestion that might be similar to remeron/klonopin with a little more mood lifting/energy w/out causing anxiety? or, an add-on? maybe a mild old school tca, if it exists. i'm extremely sensitive to meds. the remeron and klonopin have been pretty easy to take. still, i don't dig the weight and lethargy that is settling in.
besides the apathy i have a pretty good case of anhedonia going on too.
i asked these same questions when i first came here 6 months ago. i apologize. i just could use some info when i go to see the psych on monday.
thanks for any help.
john
poster:JohnLA
thread:1012169
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20120221/msgs/1012169.html