Posted by floatingbridge on August 26, 2011, at 21:32:24
In reply to Re: i dont think i'll find my anwers here... » floatingbridge, posted by B2chica on August 26, 2011, at 14:07:44
B2c,
Sounds like there is stress upon stress right now. I understand the cost factor. I do. It sounds like, though, it might be good to push through and at least call.
A minor med adjustment might be all that's called for right now. More zyprexa temporarily? I don't know about meds.... And I don't know your doc. I do remember your last visit felt 'off' to you. He might be more capable of dealing with any complexity of your situation than you think. I tend to put myself in someone else's head and assume what they might do. For some reason you aren't feeling safe in general. I don't know if those are accurate perceptions to extend to your pdoc or not.
If I was in your life, I would call for you. Recently, I had someone call (a few times :-/ ) on my behalf. I think it's really good to get someone else to go to bat for you at times. I know you wrote you don't feel you have that resource. Would it help to rethink this? I can feel embarrassment asking for help and tend to feel very ashamed. It's very difficult that when I most need help, I either can't ask or even feel unheard.
You are correct a few posts up that I am concerned about the disinhibiting effects of gabapentin. It seems like a new med in your mix, so it's not proven.
Did you get your scripts?
I am relieved that you have bottom line contracts with yourself to stay safe. Please honor them, o.k.? Because this crisis will pass, and you will regain your footing again.
It's just awful to have the feeling of needing to fight and fight
and feel exhausted to the point of distrusting help. If I am reading you correctly.But B2c, what's past is past, whatever the hurts were that color the hurts of today. It sounds possible to me that a decline in mood might have triggered a PTSD flare. But that's a lens I tend to see life through. I'm sorry if that's true for
you, too, or just plain sorry you are feeling poorly whatever the reasons.Please keep in touch if that's what will best serve you right now.
Safe hugs.
fbI dig a pony.
poster:floatingbridge
thread:994851
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110822/msgs/994960.html