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Life...wanna read?

Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on October 5, 2009, at 21:40:00

I've made doctor's appointment's and I need to see the doctor about a medical condition, someone that I know will cause fights, cancel appointments, and will not see to medical treatment.

This is what happened in 2006, I faxed various letter's to my doctor of "deteriation" he did nothing, exept write a note saying "rj is having problems", this person just threw the letter in trash, and had a confruntation with him, and basiacally listened to "propganda" of lies.

This has what has set my life back, and these people are not nice, they don't even about death, they just want their way or all hell will break lose. I had a breakdown in 2006, and this was because I couldnt focus, i called my doctor again and again, he did nothing, exept when I saw him, he said "i will not treat you". I wished, he could of seen where this was morally wrong, and it left me in distress and left to this "monster" that I live with. Monster bites, yells, and if I inniciate "defense", it won't work.

My doctor from 2005, did absolutly nothing, and just "ridded" me, threw me in trash, and that was the most devestating thing that happened, a while back. The next one...the same, because I was in a session and monster came in, and made the rules.

What do I do? This person uses control and fear and control's my medication as a power over me, because of their lack of feeling suffiecent. It held me back, and caused multitude of breakdowns.

I don't want to repeat a painful cycle of insanity with this person anymore, yet [she] has control over certain things, and can litterly cause devestation, it's happened before and it can happen again, yet i don't want to blame, this has been so agaonizing, i just go "numb". It's all a co-dependecy attachment that is hard to break as steel, you can't do with regular sissors.

Ugh, i hate my life. Why doesnt this person see, that even if i took this medication at pharmacy, it would improve the functioning of life, you can't argue with the devil, because the devil is malicious, and will take people out to make something happen, use flattey of words to cause misery, because everytime I have hope of something that I will be treated and I be able to function better in term's of mental state, it's alway's taken away, punishment. It's like the "devil", something is not being shown that stimulants "improve" aspect's that I don't have.

Just wish me the best


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Psycho-Babble Medication | Framed

poster:rjlockhart04-08 thread:919862
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20091001/msgs/919862.html