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Re: PSYCHOSIS????? ANXIETY!!! OCD!!!HELP ME PLEASE! » chiron

Posted by AMY II on March 1, 2008, at 12:52:21

In reply to Re: PSYCHOSIS????? ANXIETY!!! OCD!!!HELP ME PLEASE!, posted by chiron on March 1, 2008, at 10:45:53

You sound alot like me in many ways. Did you read my previous posts under "Dialated eyes, weird feeling in my head"? And then in 2002, 2005, I posted some stuff too, all under Amy II.

I have had irregular periods my whole life (since 13) and as I came into adulthood suffered from excessive facial hair. Not like an ape or anything but, I it's noticable if I don't wax it off. I have been obsessed by the way I look since I can remember, picking at every little thing and every little stretch mark I got along the way. :) After being an exotic dancer, which made me feel beautiful personally, I gained so much weight taking anti depressants. It seemed the "hair" situation got worse too.

So I did laser treatment which is wonderful by the way, but you do need to keep doing them every few months. I just did it once and the hair was gone for about 5 months.

Sorry to ramble about that, anyway, I am scared of birth control pills because I have taken them in the past and they haven't regulated my period but I am sure would help hormonely. I occasionally smoke too and I am afraid of a heart attack or stroke.

I TOO notice that my symptoms are FAR WORSE right before I start my period.

Xanax helps me and my doc wants to put me either on zanax slow release or klonopin. I think maybe I will try it ( currently take 1-2mg of zanax a day) but still just feel like if someone could cut at the base of my skull, everything would lighten up, straighten out, and become clear again. It's weird. I hate it, and I don't like Pdocs.

He wants to talk about my childhood. OK, had it a little rough, lived in the ghetto with my Mom, was one of the only white kids in my school, had friends, mom went out alot, left us at daycare overnight (they had a 24 hour daycare where I lived),went to school in the same clothes, never had a clean house, never had dinner together, she brought men home and I could hear her having sex with them, but when she was around she was a good Mom. I loved her. We fought, but who doesn't at that age. I was molested by her brother and her sisters husband in the span of 2 years. Never raped but made to fondle her brother (never told my mom until I was older) and my Mom's sisters husband tried to put his tongue in my mouth when I was 12. I also had a daycare owner (male) put me on his lap when i was in the 4th or 5th grade and asked me if I could feel his penis underneath his jeans and asked me if I liked it. I had a 19 year old couple that lived next door that came over to hang out with my Mom sometimes ( I was 9) and I remember he was drunk trying to use the phone in my Mom's room and needed help. I went in there and he wanted me to sit on his lap, then fondled my breast and kissed me and told me how beautiful I was.

I felt like this was my fault, that I must be doing this for so many people to have done this to me as a child.

This is just the tip of the iceburg. Is this suppose to help me with this diagnosis he has given me "for now" he says.

Antidismal or peridismal or something like that anxiety disorder.

Ugh.


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