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Re: Still no cure for my depression - tried everyt

Posted by rskontos on August 25, 2007, at 16:00:26

In reply to Re: Still no cure for my depression - tried everyt, posted by blueboy on August 25, 2007, at 15:33:11

HI guys, i have by no means tried everything but I can related to the depression issues. I am having a tough day today and I am not taking anything due to just coming off cymbalta and it was pure hel_ getting off and I refused to try anything else at the present. I dissassociate for the most part and that keeps my panic attacks and depression at bay but not today. Today isn't good and I am feeling all alone. Actually I am all alone except for my dogs and today it sucks. Can I say that. I am new to this site so if I can't I am sorry mr. moderator. but today I must ask for forgivness. I have had a troubling past and for the most part dissassociated to get through it (my therapists' words) I had migraines and have had some prescription drugs for it it is a wonder I am not hooked to pain killers because of it. But migraines are funny things and in my case they probably helped me not get hooked but now the pain killers do nothing even when I need them to. I had thoughts of suicide on cymbalta, didn't go off of it when I did, nor did I act on it. I still have them sometimes. I don't act on it. I think that these thoughts are the nature of the beast of depression. JMHO. I would never act upon them and I hope if it gets to bad I will call someone. Today I decide to write to this board. I am sorry for all of you like myself that deal with this hidden illness. The nature of it allows us to hide it and that doesn't help it to be understood by those that don't suffer through it nor does it help us get help. Double edge sword. I understand the desire to have something like cancer a curable one of course as that would allow those around to understand without you needing to explain it. It is hard to understand the nature of depression or panic attacks. It is more than the mental aspects, it is the physical nature of it too that is hard to expain. As I think about it, I recall trying to explain it to my husband who wants me to get well with therapy and move on. As if it were that simple. As if I can control it. I have been in therapy for three months and according to him I should be well and cured. I hate to tell him I might never be cured it might only be managed. Today I can't manage it. Yesterday I was great, I was working and doing well today not so good. I am sorry this is a short novel. Thanks for listening. Rk

 

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poster:rskontos thread:775476
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070824/msgs/778594.html