Posted by willyee on June 1, 2006, at 13:45:19
Im about to make a strong comment,and i know it will rattle people,but honestly i just wanna share my view.
I have spent many years reading books,aritcles,websites,newsgroups etc.....
I have stumped a p doc or two,my pharmcist has told me plain out they are not familiar with pharmcology as much as i ask.This was various pharms as well.
The only thing i can come back saying after this time is this.......
We have little knowledge on the brain and how these meds interact or help,this is not a secret,the drugs flat out tell u there method for working are "believed".
We dont know how different each persons chemistry is,we dont know long term effects,we dont know rebound effects,we know simply very little,and thats just the way it is.
I never touched a single drug my in my life,or at least an illicit one,and never had the urge too.Id stay clear of friends when they were lighting a joint,and a sip of beer made me sick.
Situational depression brought me to a p doc 10 years ago,where i was introduced to what i believed then was "medication" effexor.
Well ten years later im a shell of the person i was,a broken version of memories.
Can i contribute this to the drugs,i cant say for sure of course not,however i do personaly believe i did not arrive here on my own,i am now and i thought of this term the other day as my jaw dropped when my paharmccy was OUT OF STOCK on my drug.
I AM NOW a pharmcitcuical junkie,what makes me think im any better than a street junkie,cause i have a prescription?
I cant stop parnate,not cause of my depression,because im pyhsicaly dependant on it,stopping klonopin or a benzo is highly unadvisable,not because of the fear of symptoms retruning,but rather the pyhsical danger of abrupt withdrawal,including seizures.
So as i scan this group in search of a new drug to take,am i letting the fact i get it from a doc blind me to what i still am doing,looking for a drug?
Is that not the actions of a junkie?
What makes me better than a junkie?
Also im personaly fed up with this whole dont do nothing without ur p doc,or see ur p doc.
Ok lets use logic here,they are seeing patients non stop through the day,then they seee u for if ur lucky the whole 20 minute.
IT IS NOT possable in my opinion to address medication that affects one brain in 20 min,it is simply irrational to believe so,especialy when there is not a single scieantific instrument in the office,the doc will attempt to help u off guess work,off of what he or she BLEIEVES is best,not off of a shred,a tiny shred of scieance,ur not tested and ur chemicals evaluted to see what kind of issues u might be having etc,so why are we so stuck on the value in this 20 min appt,because they deal with patients on drugs all day and are familiar with it,this is why we are supposed to value there input?Id much rather value there input on the same way i do a Gp and thats sitting in the room alone waiting for some form of scan or blood work,not because the majority of his patients that week had a complaint similair to mine.
That is just not medicine,it is just not scieance,its reptition,and im not comfortable with that.
I dont have an answer on how to resolve this,or where we go from here,but i know deep down inside ive always known this past decade ive become more and more of a pharmcutical junkie,beliving the key to any form of well being reliead on a drug.
Im a certified network adminstrator,and in school and right after i was a walking network machine,knew it all.
It did not take long for that knowledge to become old.
If i needed to,id have to revert back to books for information,i simply know what i knew cause i was in training everyday,testing etc.
I believe thats how the p dcos are,in school they are tested and learning complex stuff,but they are SIMPLY not using this in every day practice.
I know prob everyone here disagrees with me,but im using myself as an example,im there,and my trust in this whole industry is gone,id never advise a friend to seek this form of help in depression,as far as drugs.
I also want to get myself into the habbit of never calling them medications again,until a doc uses some form of scieance,or anything at all on there basis for giving me one of these drugs,then ill will refuse to believe its a medication and not a drug,and will not try to make myself feel better about taking them by doing such.
My brother drinks a few beers every night,and by this countrys standard im the one doing right,hes the one being reckless.........yet he lives a much much much fuller life than i do,and hes never ended up in ER cause he was out of beer,so whos fooling who here?