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Re: Suicide on Effexor » simon levane

Posted by lifetime on February 18, 2006, at 2:01:39

In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by simon levane on February 17, 2006, at 19:00:46

Dear Simon,

I would like to try to make several points perfectly clear. The first being I am not faulting you or anyone for what was done or not done. I feel for you and I can empathize with the tragedy and the sense that you believe you could have done something. The fact is, from my personal experiences and knowledge; one cannot prevent a determined individual from taking his/her own life. My spouse has attempted suicide seven times and while I may be more knowledgeable about depression than most folks I could not prevent those attempts. As I stated previously, I was a former DBSA facilitator. I also lost a number of close friends to suicide as well as group participants who suffered from mood disorders. In many instances I (we) were aware the individual(s) were experiencing suicidal ideations. In several instances we acted by having the person hospitalized in order to intervene (in the state of Florida there is the Baker Act which allows the individual to be confined for 72 hours of observation, against their will, if the individual is deemed a threat to his or her self or anyone else) and yet some of these same individuals were unfortunately successful in their later attempts.

I am not trained or knowledgeable in how to lend support to those who are grieving under these unusual circumstances other than to express my sincere condolences and to share some of my personal experiences. Certainly, if you knew you could’ve acted and tried to intervene but the point I am trying to make is there are times when one knows as I do and yet I have been powerless to prevent the act. I would only share with you my belief that beating oneself up is counterproductive and while we all appear to see faults in the system, doctors, medications, treatments, ourselves etc I prefer to take what I consider a positive and more productive approach and that is to try and share and educate especially since I am still an active support person and health care advocate to my spouse. I no longer participate in many of my former advocacy and support rolls quite simply because it just took too much out of me so I now spend some of my time sharing and advocating through websites and message forums of this kind.

I shall also add that my brother-in-law also committed a slow suicide through the use of drugs and alcohol and yet all were powerless to prevent the act.

I am also not here defending anyone’s physician. I am here to state from my knowledge they are not Gods and also from my knowledge they are all not equally knowledgeable. From my personal experiences many doctors do not spend equal time studying case histories etc and they have been known to make mistakes and in some instances fatal mistakes.

One last point I would like to make. Knowing that which I do about depression I try to share with those not as knowledgeable what I believe is the unfortunate circumstances that when treating depression the reality is that it is in my opinion a “Trail and Error Approach to Wellness.” Since each individual responds differently there is absolutely no way of knowing in advance which will or will not respond to any medication and/or therapy and the extent or severity to which any individual will experience side-effects and/or contraindications. To which I shall also add from my research the many conflicting research studies on medications and various therapies as I have already cited for the other young man. I also noted the fact that while there were several tragic results attributed to Effexor XR on this forum my spouse had a successful period using very high dosages of the drug without side-effects and was also able to withdraw without any side-effects also contrary to other experiences shared here. I would also add that over the years we have been through the pharmacopeia of medications trying to maintain my spouse’s wellness. While some medications proved beneficial eventually she was refractory to most. While my spouse has had some truly bad experiences with several medications I do not condemn or advocate for the banning of any drug simply because I am also aware others have benefited. This same approach applies to ECT. While there are individuals advocating for banning the therapy I oppose such a stance simply because I am aware it benefited my spouse and others and therefore I personally prefer to educate by way of sharing our experiences and knowledge.

So again I share with you my condolences knowing that even if you did everything correctly you still may have been powerless to prevent the situation.

I wish you peace and only good and pleasant memories of your beloved daughter.

Warmly,
Herb
VNSdepression.com

.



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