Posted by Kreedi on November 4, 2005, at 19:53:33
It's been a rollercoaster of a year.
I have major clinical depression (first episode at age 10), overlaid with dysthymia. Several previous meds. Doing fine (great, in fact) on Effexor XR 112.5 for 30 months until this March. Boom! Depression again, for all of March and April. Ramped up to 187.5. Fine for May, June, July. Then the Big D again. Up to 225 (which is what I'm on now). Fears that Effexor is slowly "pooping out."
August till present (gosh it's already November): lots of mini-episodes -- lasting a wek at a time, sometimes only two days at a time. Then fine again for a week or two, then again... I don't think I'm bipolar, since I don't have mania or even hypomania, just intense depressive episodes and then normalcy. Is this what is called rapid cycling?
I'm just sick of this sickness. Today, for instance: tears, inability to get out of bed, a kind of full-body mild panic attack (that's not very common for me, though I would say that I'm an anxious person in general).
Have talked with my current pdoc about options, but haven't really established a great rapport with him. (He made the "mistake" of saying to me: "Well, depression's taught you things, hasn't it? To see the world more clearly, to be creative" etc. I HATE that.)
Don't really want to up the Effexor XR to 300 -- maybe just an irrational fear that I'll never have another orgasm (with another person) again. Can't take Wellbutrin -- it gives me severe insomnia/weight loss. I'm thinking: try augmenting with Buspirone or SAMe. Any success stories (or stories, period) with these combos?
Three more things: (1) I take Xanax and Ambien for insomnia; (2) It has been a stressful year, with lots of moving new grad school etc, but my "normal" self would have coped just fine; and (3) I'm reluctant to give up on Effexor altogether because it was such a great "fit" for so long.
Well, that's long enough, with lot's of questions. Am I just experiencing a series of "blips" (but SO many). Any other combo/augmentation suggestions? I'm seeing my doctor on Monday.
Thanks,
Kreedi
poster:Kreedi
thread:575481
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20051031/msgs/575481.html