Posted by Racer on August 26, 2005, at 13:35:33
In reply to Re: Does this make Sense?, posted by denise1966 on August 26, 2005, at 12:51:02
> I just wish I could be cured, when I took antidepressants for the first time ever I felt cured. I just don't understand why they don't work anymore and nobody else seems to know either. I keep thinking there must be some biological/chemical reason why I'm not responding to them now when I used to respond to them before and if they could just put that right then I'd respond to them. I sometimes worry that I have no serotonin receptors left and that's the reason why.
This may be an obvious question, but what were you taking at first that worked for you and how long ago?
Way back in the old days, before Prozac, I took nortriptyline and thought it was a miracle. First time I could remember feeling like myself. (I know -- don't ask how I knew it was "myself" if I'd never felt that way before...) Then, on Paxil, I felt almost as close to being myself. Then, with subsequent drugs, things kinda went downhill. They were definitely better than the alternative, but not quite good enough to be able to think of staying on them indefinitely.
I don't think that it's as easy as saying that the drugs aren't working as well for me -- I think that my expectations have changed. Now, it's not enough to block some of the depression, and side effects that I could tolerate before just aren't worth it to me now. That's not to say that the drugs work just fine, but I'm not satisfied. It doesn't feel as though the drugs are coming nearly close enough to working anymore. Problem is, they're probably working about as well as some of the other drugs did, but that's not good enough anymore. Now I want to be depression free, not just less depressed. And I want to be able to function adequately, and I just can't see tolerating some of the worst side effects of those other drugs anymore. Taking something for a year or two is one thing, but taking something indefinitely is something else again.
That's probably too rambling to be helpful, but I hope it helps a bit. And I second Link: if the Zyprexa helps, take it.