Posted by pretty_paints on August 23, 2005, at 13:55:41
First off, anyone here on Clozapine? I would like to hear about people's experiences.
This is how I'm feeling at the mo:
First off, VERY VERY TIRED. I can't believe how tired I am. I sleep all night and then late into the morning, then I feel sick all morning trying to resist going back to sleep, then come the afternoon I crash out and finally, by the evening, I'm feeling a little more *with it*. I'm really worried about this, is it going to get any better? I can't live life SLEEPING ALL THE TIME, even if it IS a good, successful drug, can I?
Secondly, I am feeling more depressed. Well, depressed I should say, as before this drug, I was feeling quite upbeat. The prob might be that my consultant reduced my venlafaxine down to 150mg when he started me on Clozapine. So I'm feeling really fed up. Don't want to get out of bed, don't see the point in doing anything, no interests etc... Maybe I should ring my doc and ask him what he thinks.
Thirdly, I have been having very low blood pressure, it has been being measured every day, no sorry twice a day, by the Crisis Team. I think it's a bit better now. But EVERYTIME I stand up from sitting/led down, I get dizzy and everything swirls. Horrible.
Forthly, I am eating so much I think I'm gonna explode. EAT EAT EAT, that's all I do!! And fantasise about eating food! It's weird, even Zyrexa wasn't this bad :( I keep binge eating too. Like I'll eat six shreaded wheat, or six cakes or three chocolate bars, instead of just one! I feel sick but I just can't stop. It's weird.
Fifthly, I have less agreement with the fact that I am so-say "psychotic". Surely if I WAS psychotic, then an ANTIPSYCHOTIC would fix it!! But none of them have! You know, I did accept, yes maybe some of my thoughts might not be true, but as time goes on and nothing changes, it makes me think that I am right in thinking that actually stuff is happening to me beyond my control. I am scared coz everyone says this drug is so amazing and blah blah, and I'm on a good dose (about 300mg now) and NOTHING'S HAPPENING. And I've been on it for a good few weeks. So maybe things just arnt going to change.
Anyway I'll leave things here as I'm starving (oh what a surprise) and I need to go ambush the food cupboards!! lol