Posted by 4WD on June 20, 2005, at 21:00:30
In reply to Re: space, time, reality, fear, panic... » 4WD, posted by portage on June 20, 2005, at 1:25:03
> Hi Marsha.
> My diagnosis is panic disorder, and I'm in remission from major depression, and i'm "unofficially" bipolar(my diagnosis was changed from bipolar disorder to major depression and panic disorder)
> My meds are:
> alprazolam, .25 mg (lately i am taking up to 6 pills a day)
> zoloft, i think its 25 mg
> wellbutrin xl, 150 mg
> seroquel, 25 mg at night, to fall asleep.
> The alprazolam stops the anxiety, and i LOVE the alprazolam for that, but no matter how sedated i am from it, a panic attack can still happen out of no where. once a panic attack starts, it can't be stopped no matter how many pills i take.
> thanks for the kind words.
> you said
> >"If I find myself in a strange situation, for example, someone is saying something that doesn't make sense but other people around me are acting like everything is okay, I start to think maybe I'm crazy."
> thats been happening to me lately.
> God, what you describe sounds so awful, what is your diagnosis?
> take care of yourself
I think a lot of people here take Klonopin for panic instead of Xanax just because the Klonopin seems more to ward off panic where the Xanax is more to treat it once it happens. I take mine as soon as I get up in the morning but I often still have a couple uncomfortable hours before it kicks in. ALso, for me Wellbutrin was not a good drug. It increased my anxiety. Effexor really treated it well, but I'd have a hard time recommending it to anyone because before I took it I only had garden variety GAD and after coming off it, I've had the actual terror thing going on.
My diagnosis is major depressive disorder with anxiety disorder. I take Celexa for the depression (it lets me be more or less functional but I'm still depressed). And of course, Klonopin for anxiety.
I think it's important to be in therapy, at least for me. My therapist had never seen me "normal" and I almost got diagnosed with borderline personality disorder because my anxiety was so intense, I was acting really weird. Having crying fits in her office, ending up on the bathroom floor at my pdocs office, crying in the dark. Just terrified. ANd couldn't control it at all. I know they thought I was crazy. But once the anxiety backed off a bit, the weird behavior stopped. I was truly suicidal from the fear. I do know first hand that anxiety, once it reaches a certain level, can make a person behave in ways that appear (even to ourselves) as crazy.
Maybe you should think about switching to a different AD. I was on Zoloft for a few weeks and I remember having a lot of morning anxiety on it. Also on Prozac and Paxil. But of course everyone is different and what is anxiety provoking in one person is calming in another.
I hope it at least helps to know that someone knows what you are going through and offers her deepest empathy and sympathy. Part of what was so bad was that I felt like no one had a clue what it felt like to be so scared and that being that scared over nothing was a pathological state and I would have to live like that forever. But mine *has* slowly gotten better. And I read in the Merck Manual that a large percentage of people with panic disorder eventually recover *even without treatment* so there is hope.
How long has this been going on? Did it start up out of nowhere or did you have anxiety before? And how long have you been on your current meds? Any recent changes?
And, again, you're not crazy.