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Re: ANHEDONIA

Posted by robot on November 14, 2004, at 19:16:29

In reply to Re: ANHEDONIA » robot, posted by sundown on November 14, 2004, at 1:12:13

I have spatial problems too. Im directionally challenged, I get lost easily--whether in real life or a video game.
How long have you been on Lex? Im off now. I took it for 6 months. Helped me just enough to keep me from suicidal. But it had done all it was going to do. Did you know some SSRIs actually decrease seretonin? I wouldnt recommend ANY SSRI without another med, for most people.
Neither of the meds made me feel not like myself--im already unlike myself, infact thats my main problem! Near-total lack of enjoyment if anything will make you feel that. A Darkness with a life of its own had taken me over 2 years ago and persisted; now I feel its just these things like no pleasure are keeping me feeling that pain, though, and not feeling like a Self. Things like trouble speaking clearly (started 2 years ago) and mental fuzziness contribute to zero relationships, and that does it too. In other words, I have enough awareness to seperate myself from the bad things and look at it more objectively. having that remission a month ago helped because it reinforced my faith in what I can be when normal.
And we WILL be normal. We havent damaged our brains beyond recovery. Thats what Ive realized.
Wellbutrin is supposd to help mainly dopamine, I think, and it hasnt helped me with enjoyment (or anything). I cant tell its doing anything. Ive read a good article online: Can Recovery From Depression Be Achieved? by Shelton and Tomarken thats given me some food for thought. SNRI (norepinephrine) acting meds indirectly act as dopamine reuptake inhibitors as well. But I dont want to do Effexor or Cymbalta, or Remeron. Im staying away from trycyclics for now. Id like to try Strattera. Few choces, though.
I would try Wellbutrin if you havent. (Provigil does Dopamine too.)
Its the hardest thing to believe that life can actually *gasp* include enjoyment! I bet you think about it like it was on another planet. You know desire and enjoyment exist. they are 'good', but its all so far away from your experience you dont remember how it actually feels. Everytime I have felt better, it comes like a wonderful surprise...THIS actually exists! What I kept talking about not haveing, giving it names like 'pleasure', actually can be felt and it IS good. WHen youre not feeling them they dont exist except as words.
Its freeing to let go, accept that your future self will enjoy these things, but for now let them lie. I feel much better since I decided that.
Meditation... dont let it intimidate you. Think of it as practice, an experiment. If you feel like youre not acomplishing much, or progressing, just laugh. Set aside a time and practice for that time no matter what happens. Youll progress and the next time not do as well, just keep practicing.
Watch the breathe at your nostrils.
Tell yourself that youre going to 'report' any words your mind chatters. If you find yourself trailing off, dont get mad just recognize it and go back to your breath.


> Robot,
>
> I appreciate your comments. I too believe that the anhedonia, lack of imagery, etc. are seperate from the depression.
>
> You seem to be saying that the drugs Lexapro and Wellbutrin make you feel not like yourself. I am only taking Lexapro and I still feel like myself, but I am considering adding something to it. My doctor likes Buspar, but I have heard that a dopaminergic drug would better address the anhedonia.
>
> I'll try meditation on your suggestion. You are not the first person to tell me that it is truly helpful. I can identify with not wanting to pursue activities that fail to make you feel good. I'm sick of trying the things that seem to make other people happy. I have to figure something better out.
>
>


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Psycho-Babble Medication | Framed

poster:robot thread:403148
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20041113/msgs/415966.html