Posted by goin nuts on September 29, 2004, at 20:55:36
Dr. bob......would like to know what you think...
I was wondering if anyone had any thoughts, I have been very impressed with the quality of the discussion here. I have recently been promoted to a job that will require public speaking, presentations, etc....Some background, I had the worst experience in my life in 1998, when I had a panic attack in front of 14 senior execs while giving a presentation. I wanted to get the hell out of the room, i could not breathe,i felt like i was floating, my boss was in the room and he calmed me down by asking me a question he knew I knew, and I was able to finish. But the sheer horror of that experience still plauges me today. I have altered my career to not be put in those situations...but find my self promoted and going to be in those situations again, and am dreading it (and everyone can't understand why I am having so much anxiety, everyone thinks i am so outgoing and postive, i feel like a fake)..thus my nome de plume (sp? sorry, from the south) goin nuts. I have found that xanax has worked well if i take before I think I am going to be in a public speaking or big meeting, and have had no problems with it...I have no desire to take it normally (it makes me a bit sleepy), but will when I know I am going to be in the above mentioned situations. As I move into a new work group, my anxiety tends to abate, when I get to know all the players and then everything is fine (last panic attack was years ago). I went to the doc, b/c i did have a panic attack at work when I started surfing the calendar of the person I am replacing...and had to leave work ( so freaking embarassing)...luckly I am a single dad (going through the divorce, and I have my son..thank god!) so i had a good excuse. Went to see my doc, and asked again for xanax.....which he was not wild about, and mentioned Inderal. Stated that many execs use it to be "bullitproof" in major board meetings (I am not an exec, but I am goin nuts). I was so anxious that I just wanted the xanax, and my pulse was sky high he put me on tropol xl. I decided to take the tropol b/c of blood pressure, and actually felt better (less anxiety) taking that. My pulse is lower, and I only have to take the xanax on as need basis (first day, meeting key execs) then I am fine. He also provided me with samples of lexapro for GAD. He wanted me to take 10mg of lexapro, one troprol xl, and one xanax (.5) at bedtime and one during day as needed. I have not done that, b/c i am concerned over SSRIs so I have not started the lexapro. The fear of speaking and the anticipatory (sp?) anxiety is still there...but i can function...i do not have agoraphobia, and really like meeting new people...my only other thing that is making me going nuts, is I really freak going overy tall bridges....ANYWAY, after my rant.... I was thinking of talking to him on my next appointment about Inderal, still use the xanax as needed (not everyday) and not even getting in to the lexapro...thoughts???? I really need some help b/c I feel like chucking the career away at times and becoming a worm farmer..(justing kidding, southern thing)...but I don't want to screw up.....thanks for listening (and by the way , I just found these types of PLACES and it is great to know I am not the only one with these problems, hell that is half the battle i think).....any thoughts are appreciated...............
poster:goin nuts
thread:397019
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040927/msgs/397019.html