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Re: Re hair and MOOD Headachequeen » TexasChic

Posted by headachequeen on November 26, 2003, at 21:50:54

In reply to Re: Re hair and MOOD Headachequeen, posted by TexasChic on November 24, 2003, at 16:33:52

> I feel for you and wish I could give you some advice, but all I can say is hang in there and try your best to persevere. You'll be back with your dogs soon, at least you have that to look forward to. In the meantime, cry when you need to, vent when you need to, and tell that doc what you think of him (he sounded pretty confusing to me too, sub-bipolar? underdepressed? what the heck?).
> I'll be sending good karma your way, so hang in there!


Thank you... hugely... I am just now catching up on back posts... reading sporadically I guess..
I came home early rather than spend American Thanksgiving with my treasures (don't have any deadlines to worry about until Monday) and could have come home on the weekend but had an appointment with my neurologist today... and thank heaven as I was leaving the dogs behind my psychologist booked an appointmet with me too.. he has come to know me, dear little man that he is... the neurologist simply wanted to kick me loose... to return me to the care of my GP... that he could have done by phone call... apparently the Tegritol and Topomax in tandem are doing their work and I do not need him...so call the GP and let him know and let that be an end to it... if I need him in an emergency he is still available... HA! that is rich... he sets up emergency tests then says to see him in three months LOL... at any rate I am really angry right now ... with myself mostly... one of my girls tried to follow me... she dug her way out of the garden in which she was staying and headed North... she was travelling in the right direction ... and was hit by a vehicle... a neighbour of the people looking after the dogs, and they are great caregivers, that is not at all in question, realised who she was, the neighbour happens to be a county sheriff and was on patrol and saw her but couldn't get to her before she was hit. He says the person could have avoided her; she was on the shoulder of the road; it was deliberate and he has charged the driver. He brought her home to the caregiver who is feeling totally distraught about it all.
They have buried her on the farm where we were training in a wonderful location and will put a rock cairn over her grave... these are wonderful and caring people... and I suppose if it didn't happen today she would have tried tomorrow... but I don't think all the topomax in the world would stabilise my mood right now...
still on the plus side of the day, the two meds in tandem have my epilepsy under control and the neuro sees no reason why I cannot continue to do the things I love to do, other than drive... I have to be at least a year seizure-free... other than that, I can go out and climb rocks and scramble around for photos, do tracking with my dogs, do agility, and tracking, all the things I "used" to do... oops, didn't know I wasn't supposed to do those things without getting permission...
but just at the moment I feel like throwing things and crying and the guilt is five miles high and rising...
kat
Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
of giving your hearts to a dog to tear


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