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Re: Oh I'm an interesting case all right... » chicklet

Posted by BarbaraCat on September 25, 2003, at 14:12:04

In reply to Oh I'm an interesting case all right... » BarbaraCat, posted by chicklet on September 25, 2003, at 13:15:29

Hi Karen,
I don't believe I have 'true' ADD because it's primarily a cyclic thing, and seems congruent with the bipolar stuff. There are plenty of times when I'm a real focussed and directed gal with none of the ditz factor. But lately, I can't seem to get anything done and am going to try ramping up the Lam.

I don't know if T3 helps with ADD but I've recently read that there might be a thyroid connection. I do find that fish oil helps alot and notice when I'm not taking it. I've tried different brands and there's a big difference. I have to take the liquid, 2 tblspoons a day to get the required 13-14M therapeutic dose. Taking that many pills would gag a horse. I also notice nicer skin and hair when I'm taking it regularly.

Now, let's talk thyroid. I've had hypothyroidism for a loooooong time, well before any lithium. It's been pretty stable 'til starting lithium and my TSH is going all over the place. I know about lithium's bad track record as a goitrogen (yeah, thanks Lithium) and would love to find something to replace it. I can't take Lam by itself cause I start swinging into hypomania pretty quickly. So, you mention trileptal. Has this replaced lithium for you as a good mood stabilizer? Anything else you want to say about it, s/e, etc?

BTW, What are your experiences of being bipolar? How do you know you truly have it if you don't get mania (which is what I take to mean by the 'fun parts').

I do get the fun parts of bipolar. Hypomania is a kick. I get super-focussed, clean the house until it sparkles, have all kinds of clever and creative things going at once, organize 'get to meet the neighbors' events. Unfortunately, I can rarely follow through with any of these grand plans because depression has a way of squelching enthusiasm for anything but surviving the moment.

I always know when I'm getting a bit too high on the manic scale because I start hearing heavenly choirs and angelic voices, everything is 'according to prophesy'. I like to stay in this mystic window for a little while because I've gotten some amazing insights and gifts from the visions in this rarified place. It's as though there's an energetic frequency I pass through that allows me to pick up the 'psychic channel' on my psyche-antenna. But alas, it then disintegrates into total chaos and a black agitated depression where I doubt everything, especially glorious visions. The angelic choirs turn into the legions of hell and follow me into the depression - voila, mixed states! So, I miss the raptures but not the hell.

But still, the whole phenomenon is fascinating. The experiences could be due to psychosis, or the condition may somehow open up some gates that let a larger spectrum in, like some hallucinogens do. I think most of the mystics and saints who had visions were probably seriously bipolar and/or schizophrenic - not to say that either condition discounts the validity of the experience. - Barbara


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