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Re: basket-case in a wave-pool fluffy

Posted by katia on August 28, 2003, at 13:48:03

In reply to Re: basket-case in a wave-pool, posted by fluffy on August 28, 2003, at 11:07:16

Hi Katy,
You really do sound exactly like me. What is this? Ultra-rapid cycling? I thought I was the only one to experience such rapid and abrupt changes from one day to the next - even within the same day.
Question: Were you "high" before you went to the bar?> and did you drink at the bar and feel your high get higher?
That happens to me - kinda like the coffee barometer. When I'm low, drinking makes it worse. When I'm verging on hypomania, I go into it with alcohol.

And haven't you been on Lamictal throughout this? How long has it been?

I sometimes wonder if these highs after lows of staring off into the distance or at the ceiling for hours on end, are just a reaction of stored energy. Kind of like bears. They go into hypernation for the winter and then can go and go and go; and they're not BP (or maybe the fuzzy sweeties have been all this time!)
Sometimes when I can't sleep, I think "of course not, I've been sleeping the past year away, I'm ready for some action! i've been dormat for too long".
I too have been having trouble sleeping the past few nights and have had to take Seroquel for sleep. I went to bed last night at 11:30 (forced myself). I thought "wouldn't it be GREAT to just sleep through the night and wake up at 8:00 and do all the things that I need to do before noon?" no such luck. I was lying there until about 1:30 finally drifted off to sleep and woke up periodically and finally totally at 10:30/11. Now it's 11:45 and I'm just having breakfast.
I can't even imagine having a partner/boyfriend beside me during this! So I remain alone forever!?!
I just want to be able to be normal!! Go to bed when it's time, sleep thru' the night and wake up refreshed at dawn with the birds ready to start the day. Doesn't that sound wonderful?????

I went to a new yoga studio yesterday and there is an "immersion" class - same class for a month. I'd love to do it, however, it's at 7am! I laughed when the teacher told me that. I said, "that counts me out, the only way I'm making a 7am class is in another lifetime when I have a different personality!".

But why can't I do normal things!!!!!! anyway, I'm getting frustrated too, Katy. Any consolation at all, you're not alone! Misery loves company? Well at least we can provide compassion and understanding for each other!!!!
take care,
Katia

>>
> I had one of my "highs" yesterday...my thoughts were jumping all over the damned place. I tried to just settle down and watch TV at about 11:00. But I worked on my house, making changes, rearranging furniture...planning all of the redecorating I want to do. Everytime I get hypomanic, I always want to re-decorate and build furniture. I suppose that's a useful high, but it's getting downright intrusive. I could not sleep b/c my mind was going..."hmmm, I should re-appolster that chair...maybe blue...maybe pink...oh--and that table..it needs new legs....should I get one from Ikea?" and so on and so forth. My face was hurting due to teeth clenching, and smiling too much (I went to a bar last night to celebrate a friend's birthday--I was giddy as hell!) Could NOT calm down. So I took a damned Temazepam and got to sleep. It couldn't be clearer to me that I'm going up and down, see-sawing all over the god-damned place. Only two days ago, I was a dead person, walking around with no thoughts in my head...the only ones I had were so muddled and slow I couldn't grasp them. Falling asleep on the couch early in the evening, staring blankly into space. I'm a classic case.
>
> So in short, I'm f*cking ready to stop this roller coaster ride. I hope, hope, hope the Li works!
>
> Thanks again Barb!
> Talk to you later,
>
> Katy


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poster:katia thread:9730
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030828/msgs/255077.html