Posted by bozeman on January 21, 2003, at 0:02:46
In reply to Inner tension, posted by Rainee on January 20, 2003, at 12:19:22
> I seem to have this problem with inner tension.
> I don't know why I tense up but I thinks it was from years of growing up in a tense home
> and I have alcoholism on both sides of my family.
> It's also a irritabilty problem that comes and goes.
> any suggestions and meds in addition to my SSRI for this ?Hi Rainee --
Didn't you say you'd only been on Lexapro a few weeks? Did you go straight to it from something else, or were you not on any meds when you started it?
The reason I wonder is 1) do you still have residuals of some other drug in your body that's still having aftereffect on you; and 2) if I'm remembering correctly that you've only been on Lexapro a few weeks, then it really hasn't had time to fully kick in yet, and your anxiety should continue to improve. However, Arthurgibson is correct that you need to, in effect, "re-train" yourself how to respond calmly to the situations around you (or if your childhood was *really* awful you may never have felt safe enough to respond calmly to anything, ever, and you may be just now getting to where you feel you have any control over your own life to begin to learn how to do that.)
My advice to you would be: Be gentle with yourself -- don't let the fact that you get anxious and stressed sometimes, freak you out. You have a safety net now -- the Lexapro. Things that would have sent you over the edge before, won't affect you as badly, though they will still upset you because your nervous system is still "trained" to expect the worst, and is used to overreacting and carrying you away on an anxiety wave. Do things for yourself that relax you -- lock the door and take a long bath, read a book, listen to calm music, take a walk somewhere you like and feel safe.
Sometimes during my lunch hour I go for long walks in the building where I work. Nothing can harm me there, there are security folk everywhere, yet the building is big enough I can walk for an hour and not retrace my steps once. Sometimes if I'm not feeling antisocial I go walk at a mall. Or at the gym, at a time when few others are there and I can have relative solitude. Most modern music frazzles my nerves after awhile, so I mostly listen to instrumental music, or relaxation CD's (Dean Evenson makes a fabulous one called Sound Healing). I go get a massage, or if I'm broke or just wanting to be alone and away from people, I give myself a foot massage. I write in my journal, or cook something and give it away (double bonus -- forces me to talk to someone, with very low chance of rejection, and keeps me from eating it. :-)
I know it's really hard when you're in the middle of an anxiety wave, but try to hold on and give the medication a chance to help you (for me, depression relief came first, physical symptom relief second, anxiety relief third or later.) But it does work if you can hold on.
We are here for you; you can always come here and talk. And if you still absolutely feel like you're about to lose it, and deep breathing or relaxation techniques don't help, go ahead and call your doctor. Or go to an urgent care facility if they have such things where you live.
This may sound silly, but something I use to get myself through the really tough moments is a "delay tactic." I say to myself, "OK, I am losing it -- but I'm not going to let myself lose it today." On the really bad bad days it's "OK, I'm not going to let myself lose it for at least another five minutes." I have not yet had to go less than five minutes, thankfully. :-) But somehow I always manage to survive that five minutes (even if it feels like I was holding my breath the whole time.) Then that small success, surviving and staying somewhat in control for that five minutes, gives me enough strength and courage to get through the next five minutes, etc. It sounds corny but it works.
Let us know how you are doing. We do care about you, and many of us have felt similar pain and will support you through it.
Be well, Friend --
bozeman
poster:bozeman
thread:136731
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030119/msgs/136828.html