> That seems like a strange thing to say to me.. I've..." /> > That seems like a strange thing to say to me.. I've..." />

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Re: Morphine for depression. shelliR

Posted by Elizabeth on November 30, 2001, at 1:17:51

In reply to Re: Morphine for depression. Elizabeth, posted by shelliR on November 28, 2001, at 19:36:13

> > > Can your family always tell when you're depressed? Is there that big a difference in your behavior toawrd everyone?
> >
> > You make it sound like you can usually "fake it."
> That seems like a strange thing to say to me.. I've never used the term fake it and I don't even think in those terms.

I just meant pretending not to be depressed.

> There are times that I am so severely depressed that I stay in bed all day, mostly sleeping.

Me too except for the sleeping part. (You know things are bad when you start thinking about abusing Zyprexa just so you can escape. :-} )

> But the stimulents make that a lot more difficult now (for better and worse).

Well...is it just more difficult to sleep, or is it also more difficult to lie around not caring about anything?

> I find it amazing how I am able to come out of my depression (like when I am shooting, or even clients are over). I don't feel like I'm faking it; something happens, perhaps it's a good dissociation, where I don't feel anything about myself, including the depression.

That sounds like more than what I mean by "faking it." It sounds like your depression is amenable to distraction -- a useful thing to know.

> What about your SO, Elizabeth? Do you consciously make an attempt to separate sometimes from the depression with him, not to fake your mood, but just to avoid, sort of let your relatiohship distract from the depression. Does he *want* to knew all your moods.

He's been depressed himself, and I don't feel I have to hide it from him, which is good because I'm a pretty crappy liar. < g > I'm not sure how trying to "separate" from the depression would be different from trying to feel better or pretend to feel better, but I've certainly attempted the latter two approaches without success.

Now, whether I *talk* to him about it or not is another story. Actually when I think about it, that depends more on him than on me, because I don't like to talk about it and that's not something I would do spontaneously. I don't try to hide it from him (like I said, bad liar), but when he's troubled about something, even if I'm depressed I will do my best to be supportive. I do make an active effort not to bring other people down, especially him.

> Are you still doing well on your meds? And is your SO's depression still pretty much in remission since he started, was it remeron?

He was taking CA Rocket Fuel+++ (he's the one who got me psyched about that), Remeron + Celexa + Provigil + Wellbutrin SR, but he was able to drop the Remeron (worried about weight gain, it was making him hungry) and is still doing well.

As for me -- comme ci, comme ca. My health insurance lapsed a couple months ago and I've been sort of in limbo trying to work something out in that regard.





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