Posted by Jane Doh on October 20, 2001, at 19:25:29
In reply to P.S. to Jane, posted by judy1 on October 20, 2001, at 18:11:40
I am sorry, Judy that I hurt you with my post. At first, your comment about the earphones to me was confusing. I didn't know how to take it. I didn't mean any harm and I apologize sincerely. Please accept my apology.
The voices I hear and the hallucinations I have been experiencing over the past 8 weeks have been paralyzing me with fear like I've never had before. I'm scared to go to sleep and to sleep in the dark. I live alone in a studio and feel like a freak at 29years old. I am very, very scared of everything right now. I just want some help and I'm just looking for safety, that's all.
Really, I can see how one like yourself can go through a whole barrage of psychiatrists and be frought with a dilemma of finding a cure for one's own symptoms by self-medication. I do take things also with an open mind with reasonable facts. It scares me that you tell me that your symptoms pervade and you've been on disability for 4 years.
For myself, I'm looking for a little bit of hope and safety. That's all. And, I'm looking to make some friends, not enemies. I thank you for passing on your suggestion as to what works for you. I just have a bit of frustration right now because I am on disability myself and would like to return to work without any symptoms - especially no voices- that is my biggest fear.
I'm very scared, I had to relive my abuse this past week with my new doctors which brought about open wounds, and I deeply regret what I wrote.
Best of luck to you,
P.S. See my website and you can see for yourself that I'm harmless. www.geocities.com/jane_doh/jane_doh