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Re: Stuff Elizabeth

Posted by shelliR on August 12, 2001, at 11:38:39

In reply to Shelli et al, Cam too if you're reading this shelliR, posted by Elizabeth on August 12, 2001, at 6:02:13

> > well, I just have been loading myself with various and sundry synthetic codeine and it works for the migraine, but then I may be jeopardizing the anti-depressant effects by building up a tolerance.
> Maybe. How much hydrocodone do you take for a migraine?
generally about 11.25mg in addition to the 20 oyx a day.
> >
> I think intermittent, ad hoc use of opiates (like you were doing before with the hydro) is probably going to be the best for you, since the OxyContin seems to be losing effect. Since you did it for a long time without overusing and without needing to increase the dose, I don't see a problem with it. It'd be nicer if you could just keep taking oxycodone with no tolerance, but it doesn't look like that's what's happening.

On bad days, I know 20mg of oxycontin is not enough, so that why I have a prn of 10 also. But for migraines that doesn't cut it. But I don't think that the parnate is touching me yet; it's only been five days and today I'll go up to 20mg. So I'm not really worried; I think it will eventually kick in for at least partial relief, but if it doesn't I may have a problem with the oxycontin. But, for instance, I didn't wake up depressed yesterday or today, so maybe it's having some sort of small effects, or it's just that my hormones aren't acting crazy. I have always had breakthrough depression premenstrually on nardil, that's when I started supplementing with vicodin. When I have two periods in a month, then I have more PMS and more depression. I think the parnate needs more time and probably a higher dose; my pdoc would like to get me up to 40mg.
> > :-) As far as grad school in psychology, most of all I really loved my course on methodology. I think everyone should be required to take a methodology course, no matter what field they are in. It makes you a more educated reader of any study.
> Oh, I agree thoroughly. It was something I was supposed to learn in my required lab course, and I took a probability class my freshman year that covered statistical methods somewhat, but I never really had a good grasp of that stuff, and I would like to. I'm hoping that my significant other, who originally was studying to be a neuropharmacologist, can teach me some of that sutff. I have picked up some along the way from reading critiques and so forth, but nothing really substitutes for good old-fashioned formal education.

So your SO was was studying to be a neuropharmacologist: sounds like a match made in heaven. < g > So you said "originally"; what did he end up getting into? Is he an MD?

> Sounds like my dad (philosophy prof), only he writes instead of doing research (although there's a lot of research required for his writings, that's for sure).
who funds philosophy writings; the university itself? (Can't see that coming from Congress)
> > Criminology is a good field to go into because congress always throws a lot of money into "fighting crime".
> Heh. My sister has gotten interested in criminology. (She's a film student, an area where I could see her applying what she learns about criminology!)
So you have an artistic sister.
> > Yes, I totally agree with your analysis of options (1) and (2) and I would add regarding option (1) that one can still experience horrible boredom even when one is depressed, another major problem with that option.
> When I'm depressed I don't enjoy anything. It's not boredom exactly, more just flatness: things don't perk me up, I can't find the silver lining even when there's no cloud.

When I'm depressed and I have to do something boring to me, jobwise, for someone else, it increases the depression; I just want to crawl back into bed. I don't mind doing the mindless stuff of running a business for myself; it sort of relaxes me, plus I wrote all my businesss programs which was fun and frustrating. I have to go out and get a book on filemaker, I can't figure out the if____, then_____. I want to say if tax isn't charged, then don't subtract tax from the total but no matter what I try, based on the help they give you in the help section of filemaker, it keeps giving me an error. That's one of the different things about working alone; you can't just turn to someone and have them figure it out for you. That is good in terms of really pushing myself, but bad when I get totally stuck, like now. You can call up these companies, but they charge you like $60 a hour, and I have a hard time justifying this, always thinking, I'll get this. I don't even always buy the books sometimes; I'll just go to Borders with a tablet and "research"!

> Between MIT and UCSB, I've been so traumatised by math that I don't think I could bear to do it again!
> My problem is I'm just not artistic. I mean, not at all: I'm not good at it, and I don't enjoy it. And anyway, I think I'd hardly be able to do any decent art if I were depressed at the time -- jeez, that's so hard to imagine even.

well you could paint figurines, like my SIL. < g > Anway, it's good for artistic people that not everyone is artistic. There is enough competition. Did you start grad school in math at UCSB? What made you choose that school?

. I'd like some feedback from Lorraine as to what she was talking about, too. Lorraine? You there? :-)
> > If there was any way that I could have said it to the person involved without everyones else's .02, and the possibility of a >heated battle, that would have been the decent thing to do.
> Okay, now I'm confused again.
Well, I would have liked to say, in the parnate thread, can't you just get over whatever and answer my questions. The questions don't have to do with personalities. But if I did that, I'd have dozens of people coming in and giving their opinion on whether you should answer someone you don't care for , etc. I know that no one has the obligation to answer a question, but why not, if you have some information that the other person doesn't have? I just wanted the question answered, I didn't want to turn it into a philosophy thread which may end up nasty. Not worth it --I'll ask my pdoc next week.

> > I just I feel like I can say anything on this thread because I would assume that most people, even those who started reading it, would have given up following it out of confusion, boredom, whatever. < g >
> Heh. Yeah, I have trouble believing that anybody besides us 3 is really following this thread. It's kinda cool actually.
I think so also. And all three of us participate in other threads, so I don't feel guilty. Actually Dr. Bob quoted something I said to Lorraine on this thread; he started his question does anyone want to meet him in London when he was going there, with my comment to Lorraine about what it was actually like when she met someone off the board. It was pretty funny that he did that; so I know at least Dr. Bob scans this thread!

How are you doing on your half dose? Isn't it about time for your pdoc to come back? Is your plan eventually to add parnate, or do the TCA and buprenorphine? Or at your most optimistic, the TCA by itself?




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