Posted by BobJ1961 on June 17, 2001, at 7:32:48
Hello everyone!
I've been reading messages on this site for a month or so now. I feel as though I've gotten to know a lot of you, even though you don't know me < g >.
Anyway, I came here because I suffer from severe depression. It's mostly treatment resistant too, and I've had it for 10 years now. I'm now 39 years old, and I can honestly say that I have not lived during my 30's! I guess that means that I've lost 25% of my life so far?
In the beginning, I had excellent results with Prozac (the benefits lasted about 2 years). After that point, it has been a neverending struggle to find SOMETHING that worked as well. Ironically, Prozac was the first drug I tried, and the LAST drug that worked! LOL
I've tried all the tricyclics, and none of those helped. In fact, most of them made me 10x worse (suicidal!) The newer SSRI's either caused extreme anxiety, sleeplessness, or psychosis. Wellbutrin didn't work either. I have not tried any of the MAOI's.
I stopped seeing my psychiatrist about 9 months ago. All he seemed to be doing was trying new things on me at random. I concluded that I could do better on my own--I started looking at what drugs helped me in the past, and which ones harmed me. I came to some interesting conclusions.
I even got desperate enough to try stuff that was illegal (like GHB!) GHB has worked wonderfully, but it's too short acting. I've been using it for about 10 weeks now, and I can already tell that I'm developing a problem with it. The "benefits" are lasting for shorter periods of time, while the side-effects are growing more severe and longer lasting (typical signs of drug addiction!)
My next step is to wean myself off the GHB and then try L-Tryptophan (in the evenings). My theory is that maybe I depleted my serotonin "stores" through long-term use of SSRI's (namely Prozac). And since L-Tryptophan is a serotonin precursor, maybe it will help to replenish those serotonin stores?
I'd also like to try L-Deprenyl (because it has neural regenerative and/or protective effects on the striatal dopaminergic system). I feel this stuff might benefit me too, because I abused cocaine/crack in the early 90's. Perhaps I did some damage to my dopaminergic system?
I've also been reading the message threads on the use of opioids to treat treatment-resistant depression. I suffer from chronic pain too, so perhaps there's something worth looking into there as well?
I also have Lyme Disease (had all the classic symptoms between the ages of 10 and 14 years of age). It went untreated for about 27 years. I had pretty good results with aggressive antibiotic therapy (after 12 months of continuous treatment) but I had to stop due to side-effects (problems with yeast infection). Since discontinuing the abx, all my symptoms have returned.
I fear that I've had Lyme Disease for too long now, and that it too might be "treatment resistant." As you can see, my medical history is complicated.
I'm a single father of two young children (ages 7 and 11) so I'm DESPERATELY trying to find something to help my depression. When my depression is under control, all my other medical problems become more "tolerable" (and I can then engage in activities that are healthy, like eating right and getting regular exercise).
Anyway, nice to finally "meet" you all! I suspect I'll be hanging around here for a long time to come < g >.
Sincerely, Bob :)
poster:BobJ1961
thread:66847
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010612/msgs/66847.html