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Re: SLS - Prayer. Is it scientific?

Posted by SLS on July 10, 2000, at 8:16:16

In reply to Re: SLS - Prayer. Is it scientific?, posted by Jennifer on July 10, 2000, at 1:05:17

> I actually got my ^&*% out of bed and went to church this morning (while on vacation in the mountains I may add) and the discussion was on "praying for yourself first". I found this a bit odd, but the pastor explained that most pray for others who are "in need" of prayer, but forget themselves. By praying for yourself first, and asking for the strength to "complete the task at hand" - whatever it may be, you will then be able to help others with their needs. Makes sense to me. So, I'm off to bed soon, and I'll pray for myself, and then for you!
> Jennifer


Yes, I find praying for others to be extremely easy.

I find it very difficult to pray for myself. I am not very religious, but I am spiritual. I use the word God freely, as it suits my spirituality. I established a relationship with God a long time ago, and have made my peace with Him regarding the life I have been chosen to deal with. I figure that He knows what I want and what I need, so why would I need to pray to Him on my own behalf?

These last few months have been pretty difficult for me. I was nearing desperation (not that I am so far removed from it right now). As I lied in bed one morning last week, I found myself praying for myself in a way I don't recall doing in perhaps twenty years. It felt as if I had allowed a wall of "strength" to come down. This was a change for me, yet it was soothingly familiar. It felt good. I haven't prayed for myself since. I guess the wall of strength and independence has been raised again. It serves to protect me in some way. I feel less vulnerable and more apt to persevere through pain. I feel as if praying for myself is an admission of defeat and represents a step along the way towards losing my battle for life. This feels safe, but I guess it doesn't feel healthy or right.

Jennifer - Thank you for posting this. I may consider praying for myself more often.


- Scott

 

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