Posted by tina on May 19, 2000, at 15:50:07
In reply to Self Realization, posted by Valley Girl on May 19, 2000, at 14:03:06
Can you elaborate on your "spiritual awakening" What did you do to make the difference, I'd love to know.
> I have not posted lately. Celexa was the reason for my posting at all the last time I was here. I had just started it and was having terrible side-effects.
> My psyc nurse practioner told me to stop after 5 weeks on 20mgs. She then gave me a sample of Effexor. I still have it, that was what, 5 weeks ago. After reading posts here, I was terrified of taking it. In the past Paxil didn't help, anitriptyline(spelling)?, hospitalization. I was depressed not crazy!
>
> Everyone here is different and unique and quite empathetic and bright. You all have your reasons for doing the meds and whatever else you need to heal your ailments. Believe me, I know what depression is. I have been there my whole 42 year old life. The hole keeps getting deeper and deeper and then someone fills it in with dirt, the problem, your still in the damn thing!
>
> When posting, at first my anger was there, on the surface, people here tried to comfort with words of "God" or "get over it". It really made me mad. For you see I am still an athiest. Always will be. Prove it to me. Anyway, being this athiest, I have had a truely good experience, I am not depressed anymore! This is the absolute first time I have not been depressed! Angry, sad,lonely, but not depressed. Expressing these emotions instead of supressing them has made the difference. The only word I knew for how I felt was depression. Does this make sense to anyone?
>
> My therapist said that I actually looked physically different, beautiful. The psyc nurse practioner, said exactly the same thing. She said I glowed with inner beauty. Like a I had a spirutual awakening. Well, maybe, all I know is I feel like someone else. A better someone else that can face the world with all the crap in it and say this is me. Maybe the depression was a gift for me. It made me realize that I was strong enough to take it. Fight it, survive it.
> Depression is inherited in my family, like red hair, small hands and psyhic ability. It's the Irish, Druid influence......
>
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> I have been told by my therapist and others that I probably will never go back to my deep depression. That is the dramatic change they see in me. Oh, I will get depressed but it will be the same as anyone, I will get out of it.
>
> Take care. I don't need meds. I don't think I ever did. I just needed self realization. I hope everyone here can get well.
>
> Valley Girl
poster:tina
thread:34021
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000517/msgs/34033.html