Posted by dj on January 9, 2000, at 2:14:59
In reply to ADD --child like, posted by Renee N on January 9, 2000, at 0:23:38
Renee,Most of what you described fits me to a t, at times. However, when I work on being disciplined I can be more structured and effective and it is not easy, particularly if I am not overly interested in what I am doing.
I wouldn't describe myself as having ADD though, whereas I have a very, good friend who is always referring to himself as ADD, which he claims is a classic entrepreneurial trait. He is extremely organized and detail oriented, though he has a hard time with conceptualizing how you implement strategic plans (as do I)...He is one of the most effective effusive, thoughtful and gregarious people I know on many fronts. Much of this he has learned by putting his time in at Toastmasters, working with daytimers, etc...and dealing with the depression, self doubt, and disorganization which has plagued him at times.
I am one of the least effective people I know because I tend to obsess too much at times about what's not working rather than focusing on what is working or the converse. I am easily distracted and can easily fly off on a tangent or pull inward. I hate being interrupted or not listened to but when I listen to myself I am babbling at times, which I do in print here and elsewhere when I'm not being disciplined or paying attention. Some people consider me quirky (including my therapist who thinks I spend too much time psycho-babbling) others consider me an amazing networker. I'm both on the surface but as a networker I don't follow through, because I lack direction, faith, inspiration and consistency. I'm far too easily swayed by how I 'feel' even though on the surface I can appear to be cooly rational, and am at times...but not enough..
I could babble on and I won't much longer. The point I am attempting to make is sure we all have tendencies to greater or lesser degrees. I believe we can change those, somewhat,if we work really hard at it with discipline and consistency, something I still struggle with.
My lack of discipline comes to some degree from being a somewhat spoiled kid who was used to getting his own way and often not certain how to react when he didn't other than by getting depressed or angry, or charming sometimes...or just pulling away...all of which I still do...
Take a look at http://www.undoingdepression.com
Dr. O'Connor has some very intersting comments there from his book of the same name about how he believes depression is something that we learn, to some degree, and it becomes a part of us so it is very difficult, but not impossible to retrain ourselves -- just very demanding work, as he has learnt from his own experience. ADD and any other such label I think just outline our genetic and learned preferences, tendencies and beliefs which I believe are alterable to some degree.Below someone referenced a NYTimes Mag. article on placebos which I read earlier tonight. It's a very good overview on some of the scientific thinking and expermentation in that area and how so little is know about how our minds influence our health, drastically, for better or for worse.
> Sorry I ranted and raved, but my family is making it very clear to me lately that they are tired of me obsessing about ADD and/or depression and my meds. How can I not talk about things that invade my mind, body, actions, and heart every minute every second of every day? I can see how they are all sick of it. Like I'm >not!?
Ditto! It's hard to find a balance between noting and obsessing. I'm still working on it and may be for the rest of my days. Good luck!!
poster:dj
thread:17918
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000101/msgs/18451.html