Posted by Racer on May 29, 2004, at 15:40:57
OK, remind me that it's really and truly OK that I'm not perfect. Remind me that other people's unkindness is not directed at me because I deserve every damn bit of it that I get. Of course, that won't sink in, because I know that it's my fault, but at least please try.
Alternately, if anyone wants to kidnap a certain very unkind woman and solve the problem that way, I can give you directions on where to find her. (This is not the aunt who's staying with me, by the way. She's also involved in this, but more sinned against than sinning. Although she and I did not exercise the best possible judgement -- and I'm trying to remember that I wasn't exercising any judgement, because I let the Grown Up decide in those situations. Then, of course, I beat my head against the wall for having failed to act as a grown up myself, and then I remind myself that when I try to do so, The Grown Up resists my efforts. Yeah, I feel trapped. I also feel as if I have no chance of ever experiencing self-respect, let alone anything resembling self-love.)
Someone rescue me? Anyone got a boat? I'm drowning.
poster:Racer
thread:351901
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20040501/msgs/351901.html