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Re: difference bet no 'future' and wanting to die?

Posted by Peter on December 17, 1999, at 21:55:22

In reply to Re: difference bet no 'future' and wanting to die?, posted by Kev on December 17, 1999, at 14:37:55

Hey Kev
I feel like I'm in exactly the same boat. I dropped out of my Ph.D. program this summer because I just could not find the emotional energy to deal with my dissertation. I have been dealing with depression since I was little and I thought I had licked it by going to therapy, meditating, etc. When I look back on my decision to go back to school, I really think I was delusional! Anyway after starting school, the depression really hit me and I have spent the last 3 years trying every drug under the sun in many combinations and hoping that something would work. I got through my classes and did well academically but the dissertation killed me; I just could not go on. So where does that leave me now? Without a career and without the energy to pursue something new.
Right now I'm taking clomipramine and just praying that it will work but today I have been feeling the same fatigue that I felt on all of the SSRIs. The frustrating thing is that a drug would seem to work for maybe 1 or 2 days and then I would lose the effect. I am beyond tired of this process. Anyway I wish you all the best and if it's any comfort, there are others in similar situations. Peter




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